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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, after spending 6 months and $15,000 on lawyer fees at my 13 year old son's request, his abusive, alcoholic father no longer has any legal right to see him. How did my son repay me? He ran away to live with his father the very first time I told him he couldn't have friends sleep over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35365) - you deserved it (6305)
On 07/10/2011 at 8:01pm - kids - by tomcat69 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I met my husband's old high school sweetheart. My mother-in-law introduced me to her as "one of my son's friends." We've been married for over eight years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28938) - you deserved it (2094)
On 06/20/2011 at 10:40pm - love - by minnEmouse (woman) - United States
Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47242) - you deserved it (3019)
On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35536) - you deserved it (2586)
On 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by nicknick2 (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51353) - you deserved it (3593)
On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32111) - you deserved it (3130)
On 05/03/2011 at 10:23am - misc - by Diesel (man) - Belgium (Luxembourg)
Today, I saw a car swerving in front of me on the freeway, so I whipped out my cell to report the DUI. As soon as it started ringing, I see police lights in my rear view and got slapped with a ticket for using a cell phone while driving. After explaining why, the officer said, "Nice try." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20080) - you deserved it (19127)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:22am - misc - by AE86Turbo (man) - United States (California)
Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29110) - you deserved it (5749)
On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -
Today, I got pulled by a cop because I forgot to put my registration sticker on. I get nervous around authority and have nervous shakes. I ripped the registration sticker 3 times trying to put it on. The cop then gave me a ticket for "Improper Equipment". FML
I agree, your life sucks (20193) - you deserved it (4868)
On 04/30/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by Cody - United States
Today, I asked my friend to stop texting me, because I'm on a limited plan and didn't want to go over my limit. She responded by getting a group of her friends to text bomb me. I got well over a hundred one-word texts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24829) - you deserved it (6041)
On 04/25/2011 at 12:27pm - misc - by Text - United States (Maryland)
Today, I celebrated my birthday with a few friends at home. As I bent down over my cake, my friend pushed my face into it. The baker should have told me she put in a stick to support the cake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30134) - you deserved it (2328)
On 04/25/2011 at 1:01am - misc - by Mr. Headshot -
Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28935) - you deserved it (4874)
On 04/24/2011 at 4:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I was walking home through the slush and snow when a car drove by, soaking me with dirty water. Frustrated, I flipped him off. He then turned around and splashed me again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31280) - you deserved it (15959)
On 04/04/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by lynn777 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was trying to replace the lightbulb in my bedroom. Since I couldn't reach it by myself, I grabbed and stood on a chair. After I got two broken bones, and had stitches in my forehead, I figured that using a chair with wheels probably wasn't the best idea after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7522) - you deserved it (52454)
On 03/31/2011 at 10:23pm - misc - by owies :( - United States (Florida)
Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (5026)
On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)
Friday 24 May 2013
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