Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

KM96

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

KM96

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4973
  • Number of comments : 302
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About KM96 : I enjoy reading FMLs of course :P

I love ...
Music, Dance, Purple, Animals, Family, Friends, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, Miranda - the TV show, Kath and Kim, Movies, The Mentalist and Castle

I don't like ...
School (but I work hard anyway), Arrogant people, Public toilets, Horrible smells, People that smoke, Homework and Sci-fi.

Well have a good day :)

KM96's page activity

Visits<b>ksadhera</b> - 7 hours ago<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:19am<b>sofaqueen_</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:34pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>pam_2625</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 9:58pm<b>princessSLPS16</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:00am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 8:49pm<b>MiaChante</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 12:32am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 5:01pm<b>bacon69148</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:24pm<b>FuckMyLife_Ninja</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 6:40pm<b>Dallasluver19</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 4:10pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 1:19am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 11:34pm<b>limark</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 7:23am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:12am<b>Koankuru</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 5:27am

KM96's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of KM96's badges

KM96's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbors left for their nine month excursion, and armed their security system. One of the features is a loud series of three beeps every three seconds, 24 hours a day. I can hear it, clear as a bell, throughout my entire house. FML

#20119554
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20927) - you deserved it (1215)

On 10/16/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

#20119331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19821) - you deserved it (11218)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I got a call from my son's school saying to pick him up because he'd shat his pants. He's in high school. FML

#20119263
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24915) - you deserved it (2526)

On 10/16/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by Mike - United States

Today, a one-eyed drunken homeless man followed me around the store I work at, screaming at me because I turned down his sexual advances. My managers and coworkers wouldn't kick him out because they thought it was funny. FML

#20119087
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24029) - you deserved it (1747)

On 10/16/2012 at 12:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

#20118693
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26880) - you deserved it (3324)

On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML

#20118194
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23887) - you deserved it (2023)

On 10/15/2012 at 3:57pm - money - by Pissed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the power went out at school. If it's out for more than twenty minutes, standard procedure is to let us go home. They came back on almost nineteen minutes later. FML

#20118123
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24290) - you deserved it (3194)

On 10/15/2012 at 3:00pm - work - by anon - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML

#20117570
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25696) - you deserved it (9151)

On 10/15/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, a clown came over for my son's 8th birthday party. There was a moment of silence then laughter as everyone realized the clown and I were wearing the same plaid shirt. FML

#20117322
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21390) - you deserved it (4237)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:24pm - kids - by Randolph (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned why so much money has been missing from my credit card account. My boyfriend stole it, and has been buying toys for his 3 children. I never knew he had kids. FML

#20117313
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24747) - you deserved it (2519)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:19pm - money - by katie_sadface (woman) - Canada

Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turned to me and said, "You're really bad at this." I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. FML

#20117136
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16427) - you deserved it (7661)

On 10/14/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by amiliaroberts123 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23250) - you deserved it (4265)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML

#20115908
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20255) - you deserved it (3381)

On 10/14/2012 at 12:39am - animals - by Patrick - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was talking to my future mother-in-law about my upcoming wedding. She told me that I wasn't allowed to have the wedding at a church, nor wear a white dress, nor have roses for flowers, because that would mean I'd be "copying" her. FML

#20115456
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26843) - you deserved it (1467)

On 10/13/2012 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML

#20114686
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21696) - you deserved it (2307)

On 10/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: