Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

KM96

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

KM96

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5254
  • Number of comments : 302
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About KM96 : I enjoy reading FMLs of course :P

I love ...
Music, Dance, Purple, Animals, Family, Friends, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, Miranda - the TV show, Kath and Kim, Movies, The Mentalist and Castle

I don't like ...
School (but I work hard anyway), Arrogant people, Public toilets, Horrible smells, People that smoke, Homework and Sci-fi.

Well have a good day :)

KM96's page activity

Visits<b>ksadhera</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 1:23am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:19am<b>sofaqueen_</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:34pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>pam_2625</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 9:58pm<b>princessSLPS16</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:00am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 8:49pm<b>MiaChante</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 12:32am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 5:01pm<b>bacon69148</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:24pm<b>FuckMyLife_Ninja</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 6:40pm<b>Dallasluver19</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 4:10pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 1:19am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 11:34pm<b>limark</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 7:23am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:12am<b>Koankuru</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 5:27am

KM96's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of KM96's badges

KM96's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26601) - you deserved it (4760)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I thought it would be nice to park my new car under a big, shady oak tree to prevent it from heating up in the sun. The big, shady oak tree thought it would be nice to shed a massive branch on top of my new car. FML

#20196008
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20860) - you deserved it (3468)

On 12/08/2012 at 4:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad got a warning from our ISP for going well over their fair usage limit. I barely use our wifi, and I keep telling him he should password-protect our router to stop people leeching our Internet. He's blaming me anyway, and says I'm grounded until January. FML

#20195319
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22392) - you deserved it (1574)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:49pm - misc - by WPA2 OR DEATH (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after a romantic dinner, movie, and stroll in the park, we had our first kiss. It would have been perfect, had a passerby not thrown rubbish at us for "unnecessary public display of affection." FML

#20194899
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21848) - you deserved it (2920)

On 12/07/2012 at 7:39am - love - by First Kiss - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my best friend announced she was getting married. I've always wanted to be a bridesmaid but she then added, "You can't be in the bridal party because you don't have the same body type as the other bridesmaids. But you can still come to the bachelorette party!" FML

#20194701
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29536) - you deserved it (2458)

On 12/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by SBCR (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML

#20194684
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26721) - you deserved it (4171)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:46am - misc - by lingadoo - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML

#20194217
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21643) - you deserved it (1631)

On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dog died and I told my grandfather I wanted her to be cremated. I came home later to find him burning her in our barbecue pit. FML

#20193405
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32911) - you deserved it (3673)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:18am - animals - by psd60 - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23247) - you deserved it (2320)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML

#20192452
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22230) - you deserved it (2643)

On 12/05/2012 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (3712)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at school, I have to do a 45 minute presentation with a girl who has panic attacks so bad that she cries, runs out of the room, and sometimes passes out. This presentation terrifies her and it's a major part of my final grade. FML

#20192286
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22179) - you deserved it (2017)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by Murlocmurk - United States

Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML

Today, I ran into my high school crush at Target. When I asked her if she remembered me, she patted me on the head, said, "Unfortunately," and walked away. FML

#20191408
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21666) - you deserved it (2302)

On 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm - misc - by Likian5 (man) - United States

Today, while at work taking notes on a pad of paper, my boss witnessed me trying to scroll down on the paper, as if it was a touch-screen phone. FML

#20190845
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6149) - you deserved it (25801)

On 12/04/2012 at 12:16pm - work - by mdg (man) - United States (Connecticut)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: