Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

KM96

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

KM96

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4492
  • Number of comments : 302
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About KM96 : I enjoy reading FMLs of course :P

I love ...
Music, Dance, Purple, Animals, Family, Friends, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, Miranda - the TV show, Kath and Kim, Movies, The Mentalist and Castle

I don't like ...
School (but I work hard anyway), Arrogant people, Public toilets, Horrible smells, People that smoke, Homework and Sci-fi.

Well have a good day :)

KM96's page activity

Visits<b>sofaqueen_</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:34pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 11:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:45am<b>pam_2625</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 9:58pm<b>princessSLPS16</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:00am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 8:49pm<b>MiaChante</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 12:32am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 5:01pm<b>bacon69148</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:24pm<b>FuckMyLife_Ninja</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 6:40pm<b>Dallasluver19</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 4:10pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 1:19am<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 11:34pm<b>limark</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 7:23am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:12am<b>Koankuru</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 5:27am<b>classybrunette</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 5:43pm<b>annihil8or</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 12:19am

KM96's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of KM96's badges

KM96's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years proposed to me. Less than 3 hours later, he panicked and made me give the ring back. FML

#20407692
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40152) - you deserved it (3960)

On 12/19/2012 at 3:47pm - love - by mahanaaa_23 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML

#20407433
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13016) - you deserved it (32692)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML

#20407423
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8736) - you deserved it (58498)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the girl I dumped three years ago because she wouldn't take my band seriously is now a successful and rich environmental scientist. Meanwhile, I'm still unemployed, living with my parents, and can barely remember how to play a guitar. FML

#20407310
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10732) - you deserved it (73913)

On 12/19/2012 at 10:26am - love - by rightinthekarma (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML

#20407286
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33001) - you deserved it (3604)

On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33036) - you deserved it (19016)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, I was out on a dinner date when suddenly a girl walks up to us and says to my date, "Girl, you can do so much better." Hearing this, my date looks at me, nods, gets up and walks off. I still had to pay for everything. FML

#20406289
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43637) - you deserved it (3447)

On 12/18/2012 at 8:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML

#20405418
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29987) - you deserved it (8561)

On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw my daughter dusting her furniture with the white handkerchief I gave her as a wedding present. It's been in our family for 4 generations. FML

#20405217
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30449) - you deserved it (5051)

On 12/18/2012 at 5:03am - kids - by teejayrn -

Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML

#20405129
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15625) - you deserved it (25347)

On 12/18/2012 at 2:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was hit in the head by a golf ball. I wasn't near a golf course, and nobody was anywhere in sight. I'm still trying to figure out what happened. FML

#20403784
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35987) - you deserved it (3456)

On 12/17/2012 at 2:38pm - health - by wtf - United States

Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

#20403715
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40232) - you deserved it (4494)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by crazy mother in law (woman) -

Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML

#20403594
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30637) - you deserved it (5733)

On 12/17/2012 at 11:21am - kids - by Bonding_boys (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

#20402614
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33887) - you deserved it (9154)

On 12/16/2012 at 7:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27071) - you deserved it (12833)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: