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JustDerpin

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JustDerpin
  • Town/Country : Nowhere, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4396
  • Number of comments : 170
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About JustDerpin : Hi, I'm a person

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JustDerpin's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating lunch naked at my home watching porn on the big screen. I heard the garage door opening meaning my roommate was coming home. In my haste to get dressed, I fell back in the barstool I was sitting in and knocked myself out. I woke up still naked and with lettuce all over me. FML

#278861
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21628) - you deserved it (71659)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:26pm - intimacy - by HansonLUVR (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I borrowed a van to move some of my furniture. I wasn't used to the brakes so when I stopped at a red light, I pretty much ended up in the cross walk. Suddenly I heard a loud thud at the side of the van. I turned to see what idiot would walk into a van. It was a blind man. FML

#174723
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12653) - you deserved it (44204)

On 03/01/2009 at 8:09pm - misc - by jazojigga (man) - United States (California)

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

#161178
992 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58844) - you deserved it (643078)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to chill with my best guy friend and his girlfriend, whom I recently met after I moved to the area. After a few beers, my buddy leaned over and tried to make out with me. I quickly backed up and shockingly looked over at his girlfriend to expect the same reaction. She winked. FML

#120277
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59387) - you deserved it (6777)

On 02/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by LilShawty2000 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML

#115148
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10376) - you deserved it (34068)

On 02/23/2009 at 4:58pm - animals - by frenchpop1960 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213690) - you deserved it (73281)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (213690) - you deserved it (73281)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in a toilet cubicle, when I overheard two of my friends at the sink talking about how ugly and skinny I was. FML

#1516
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17636) - you deserved it (1537)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - misc - by Youknowwho - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the only cute girl in my office made fun of me because I'm 27 and bring fruit cups with my lunch. FML

#1197
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13838) - you deserved it (2865)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:36am - love - by liltravol23 - United States (Georgia)

Today, the only cute girl in my office made fun of me because I'm 27 and bring fruit cups with my lunch. FML

#1197
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13838) - you deserved it (2865)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:36am - love - by liltravol23 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was trying to finish an english assignment and I was not sure how to complete it. So I emailed my teacher asking and she said flip over the assignment handout page for instructions. FML

#1166
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3475) - you deserved it (19381)

On 01/14/2009 at 8:47pm - misc - by FUKDOUG - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mother bought me Mickey Mouse shaped burgers for my dinner. I'm 19. FML

#998
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10901) - you deserved it (4570)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:56am - misc - by ana9 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I marked 600 emails in my gmail inbox as spam and it will take me hours to go through and unmark them. FML

#838
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4293) - you deserved it (20668)

On 01/01/2009 at 11:34pm - work - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I crawled into bed at 2 in the morning. At 6 am, the telephone rang, waking me up. It was a wrong number. FML

#243
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35272) - you deserved it (11769)

On 11/07/2008 at 7:47am - misc - by Tom - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)



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