About Junkie_Razor : ......
Junkie_Razor's FML badges
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Junkie_Razor's favorite FMLs
Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML
by theshameofit / 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm / Cyprus (Limassol) / Intimacy
by 123roomielover / 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Miscellaneous
by fail / 01/15/2011 at 8:50pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 3:04am / Canada (Quebec) / Love
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
by blackitalian / 11/26/2010 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was feeling nauseous and my cat was comforting me. I breathed in through my nose, and my cat's fur caused me to sneeze. I sneezed so hard, I threw up out my nose. Nothing will get rid of the smell from within my nasal cavity. FML
by can't breathe / 11/22/2010 at 6:33am / Australia (Western Australia) / Health
by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 5:58am / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
by flying13 / 11/03/2010 at 3:27am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 4:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, finishing up in the shower room, I walked into the kitchen to get a drink. Apparently both bathrooms were occupied and my grandmother really had to go... She was bent over in the kitchen peeing into a cup. I may never be able to erase this image. FML
by Anonymous / 10/18/2010 at 7:48am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was tidying my room when my gran came in and offered to help. I said I didn't need any, but she started going through it anyway. She found a tube of "Very Cherry" lube and asked what it was. I subtly tore off the label and tried to convince her it was a face mask. She's taken it to try it out tonight. FML
by Dilly / 10/10/2010 at 4:29pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…