Junkie_Razor

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Offline (the 09/20/2016 at 3:39am)

Junkie_Razor

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Junkie_Razor
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1937 (79 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2287
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Junkie_Razor : ......

Junkie_Razor's page activity

Visits<b>xXBlakDayXx</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 2:33am<b>SuckItOrDieX69</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 12:31am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 3:45am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 7:13pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 6:56pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 2:02am<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 9:18pm<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 11:06am<b>lapperly</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 3:31pm<b>emmilol</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 6:34am<b>billionair11</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:13pm<b>TheBlackRussian</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 4:03pm<b>Behind_walls</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 11:11pm<b>U_GotitDude</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 1:48pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 10:25am<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 11/13/2011 at 12:49am

Junkie_Razor's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Junkie_Razor's badges

Junkie_Razor's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

by NaniNarcotic / 08/16/2011 at 6:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

by FML! / 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I went into a crowded store and tried out a blazer. I was thinking to myself how hot I looked in it when the manager tapped me on the shoulder and politely said, "Excuse me sir, that's a ladies' blazer." FML

by Fred / 08/05/2011 at 1:45am / Japan / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that when you piss on a hornets' nest from a window, the hornets will go after the source of the stream. It can also cause you to fall through your friend's second story window. FML

by freakfreak12345 / 07/19/2011 at 12:41pm / United States (Maine) / Animals

Today, my dad told my little brother that Tokyo is in China. This is the same guy that yells at me every time I get a "B" on a report card. FML

by j1hill33 / 07/14/2011 at 1:09am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went into hospital for knee surgery. When I awoke, I was surprised to find a bandage wrapped around my throbbing head. The nurse explained that a student observer had fainted in the operating room and his head had smashed against mine on the way down. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2011 at 11:46am / Belgium (Liege) / Health

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

by Stacy / 07/05/2011 at 12:04am / United States / Work

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

by ali grace / 05/14/2011 at 7:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I witnessed two women in a catfight, ripping clothes off each other. This would have been great if the two women weren't my mom and my grandma. FML

by Danny / 04/25/2011 at 9:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, it was the début of the high school musical I was in. When two others and I sang the word "Hell", my mother yelled at us for using that language, while the musical was still going, and dragged me off stage. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

by NotAsToughAsHeThinks / 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm / United States (Montana) / Health

Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2011 at 7:09pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Health

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

by bob / 02/05/2011 at 7:02am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous