Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jthewat

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

Jthewat

1Liked!

JthewatJthewat
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 August 2000 (14 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 461
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Jthewat : I love Anime's like: Naruto, Death Note, Darker than Black, Attack on Titan, etc.

And Video Games Like: Zelda, Darksiders, Naruto Storm, Super Smash Bros, Watch Dogs, etc.

Jthewat's page activity

Visits<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:55pm<b>qdawg06</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 12:33am<b>bedforddanesss</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 11:19pm<b>unicornluver3173</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 11:20pm<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 3:18pm<b>bellles</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 12:35am<b>Ins3rtEpicName</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 7:41am<b>quickit</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 6:57pm<b>gurbism</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 9:36am<b>Becca_Bear_98</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:55am<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 7:32pm<b>AHSFan</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 7:11pm<b>averynicole18</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 11:03pm<b>catherine012</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:22pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:17pm<b>CarlyMarDry</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 9:36am<b>MrSassypants</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:14am<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 2:41am

Liked!<b>bkirky</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 4:56am

Jthewat's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of Jthewat's badges

Jthewat's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

#21319149
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25953) - you deserved it (4978)

On 12/17/2014 at 1:47pm - misc - by RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26458) - you deserved it (3176)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42296) - you deserved it (10720)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27991) - you deserved it (3169)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was speeding home, bursting to take a crap. I pulled into my driveway and made it inside, before my wife told me the plumber was still working on our pipes. I ended up having to take a crap in my own backyard, behind a tree. FML

#21298320
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31572) - you deserved it (2842)

On 11/13/2014 at 1:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36331) - you deserved it (2415)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while doing physical therapy exercises for my broken leg, I managed to throw my back out. Now I can neither walk nor sit up. FML

#21281586
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29548) - you deserved it (2541)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:00am - health - by cray12 - United States

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29511) - you deserved it (7817)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my younger sister ran into my room, telling me someone was trying to break in. We were home alone, so she went to hide as I took a crowbar and followed the intruder. Just as I was about to swing, he turned around: it was my dad. I had to explain to my sister that burglars don't have keys. FML

#21251987
62 comments

Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly at the last of it, looked up smiling and said "thanks". The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML

#21237898
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35142) - you deserved it (10006)

On 08/15/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38880) - you deserved it (12869)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51101) - you deserved it (5917)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing some soccer with my buddies, when a kid came over, yelled "CUP CHECK!" and nailed me in the nuts then ran away laughing. Millions of my unborn children died in agony. All his fatass mom did was chuckle nervously and pat her satan-spawn on the head. FML

#21166299
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48087) - you deserved it (4884)

On 06/07/2014 at 5:16pm - health - by wish his dad had worn one (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33937) - you deserved it (11834)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

#21023495
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48338) - you deserved it (4581)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:47am - misc - by wtf - United States (New York)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: