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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Jrook

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Jrook
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 744
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Jrook's favorite FMLs

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

#9048258 (309)

I agree, your life sucks (15675) - you deserved it (6992)

On 03/13/2010 at 2:32pm - misc - by smellsgood (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

#9019177 (291)

I agree, your life sucks (21167) - you deserved it (4687)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:17am - love - by justlittleoldme (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML

#8189417 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (14743) - you deserved it (4687)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:04am - animals - by Chris - United States (California)

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

#8099934 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (6296) - you deserved it (13668)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by squishy - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML

#8051668 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (26534) - you deserved it (3114)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:20pm - kids - by justme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was having a very realistic dream about a hot guy. Just as he was leaning in to ravish me, I was rudely awakened by the sound of my husband farting and snorting at the same time. FML

#8005552 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (19823) - you deserved it (7719)

On 02/08/2010 at 6:24am - love - by dreamteam (woman) - United States

Today, I was in the car with my friends. A techno song came on and we started fist pumping. We hit a bump, I fist pumped myself in the face, and crashed into a stop sign. FML

#7803778 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (7224) - you deserved it (32661)

On 02/02/2010 at 12:51am - misc - by wolfpacking - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML

#7609495 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (22475) - you deserved it (2675)

On 01/27/2010 at 9:05am - misc - by samantha (woman) - Singapore

Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML

#6802710 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (20668) - you deserved it (2919)

On 12/17/2009 at 10:48pm - love - by yoked (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, trying to make my 6 year old daughter to laugh, I drew a picture of a butt, a puff of air coming out and the word "toot". My daughter thought it extremely funny. Later, when she was talking with my extremely judgmental mother-in-law, I heard her say "daddy taught me how to draw butts." FML

#1453459 (92)

I agree, your life sucks (14494) - you deserved it (34744)

On 04/29/2009 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML

#1975 (37)

I agree, your life sucks (18890) - you deserved it (1097)

On 01/21/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by mat - Sent from mobile version