Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jovecove

Search for a member

Jovecove
  • Town/Country : Lion City, Singapore
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1775
  • Number of comments : 257
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Jovecove : Johardwood

I'm really nice. :)

People should setup a profile so that I can enjoy creeping more. ;)

Twitter: @Jovistar69

Jovecove's last visitors

TezomaLynxieLynxRababcoalexmac222PlayLeagueAllDayTheImaginarySongSnackycakespaced94Somefruits

Jovecove's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of Jovecove's badges

Jovecove's favorite FMLs

Today, was the last day of the prank war between me and my husband. I told him the last prank needed to be the best one. I took a shower and tried to think up my last prank. When I got out of the shower, my hair was green. FML

#18080621
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11219) - you deserved it (31918)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by mycedes - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

#18078526
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38475) - you deserved it (3724)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:58am - intimacy - by Darcy (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML

#18048411
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11616) - you deserved it (33966)

On 10/22/2011 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43356) - you deserved it (2901)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46808) - you deserved it (14935)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

#18013165
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15585) - you deserved it (28084)

On 10/18/2011 at 2:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

#18004959
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61944) - you deserved it (3707)

On 10/17/2011 at 4:39am - misc - by cupcake_butt - United States

Today, my sister had a friend for a sleepover. They filmed a video in which the friend was lying in my bed, singing. An hour after the girl went home, her parents called. She has lice, and had brought them to our house unknowingly. I can see each and every individual larva on my pillow. FML

#18003524
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32754) - you deserved it (2112)

On 10/17/2011 at 12:04am - animals - by minder97 - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML

#18002643
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13098) - you deserved it (18387)

On 10/16/2011 at 10:50pm - work - by Kate - United States

Today, I lent my sister $1000 because she and her husband were in some debt. They used the money to go gambling in Vegas and won a major jackpot. They won't even give me a cut. FML

#17948553
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33186) - you deserved it (5551)

On 10/10/2011 at 12:04am - money - by cc - United States (Montana)

Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML

#17945907
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7199) - you deserved it (25594)

On 10/09/2011 at 7:28pm - love - by Slayer - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking down the street on my way to work, when an old lady's walking stick caught my leg and sent me crashing to the ground. She apologised for the accident and watched me stumble to my feet. I said not to worry. Just as I turned to leave, I could swear a smirk crept over her face. FML

#17930849
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22675) - you deserved it (2850)

On 10/07/2011 at 9:23pm - work - by Lucas79 - Australia

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

#17919318
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23346) - you deserved it (1467)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:23am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I saw a girl wearing a Nirvana shirt. Since Nirvana has been my favorite band for a long time, I tried striking up a conversation with her. Turns out she doesn't even listen to them, and only bought the shirt because she "liked the smiley face." FML

#17902155
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24744) - you deserved it (4429)

On 10/04/2011 at 4:57am - misc - by storksleuth (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18837) - you deserved it (42231)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: