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JoshuasGirl

Offline (the 10/28/2014 at 11:52am) | Search for a member

JoshuasGirl

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 237
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

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JoshuasGirl's page activity

Visits<b>swarm20</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 11:25pm<b>skiddalz</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 1:55am<b>helloimsaraa</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 4:40pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 5:42am<b>foxxakush</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 4:30am<b>_ashole</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 5:55pm<b>aaronyetter</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 12:48pm<b>ndnpride88</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 9:00am<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 1:55am<b>firetrucker2857</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 1:35am<b>burro012</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 12:49am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Mike09220</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 7:04pm<b>saocrates</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 6:58pm<b>Anthony52</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 10:08am<b>zachwade</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 11:24pm<b>jtrizzle93</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 10:23pm<b>flufee2</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 9:43pm

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JoshuasGirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a decomposing hamster deep in my closet. My daughter had hidden "Peach" after accidentally killing it and said it had ran away a month ago. And I'd believed her. FML

#21271391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34583) - you deserved it (4059)

On 10/05/2014 at 5:34pm - kids - by SmellyCloset (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42095) - you deserved it (8713)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my allergies flared up and I started sneezing. I guess my girlfriend was having a bad day, because she lost her shit and started telling me how annoying I am and how I can never do anything right. I'm not sure if we're still a couple, because she stormed out and won't answer my calls. FML

#21270617
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35713) - you deserved it (2952)

On 10/04/2014 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

#21270394
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35799) - you deserved it (4219)

On 10/03/2014 at 11:08pm - health - by Disappointed -

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43176) - you deserved it (3649)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML

#21268536
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38440) - you deserved it (7681)

On 09/30/2014 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45938) - you deserved it (3631)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time, after he repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me. He passed out halfway through. FML

#21002524
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47590) - you deserved it (5740)

On 12/23/2013 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by JoshuasGirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50155) - you deserved it (6940)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51871) - you deserved it (14927)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML

#20999459
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53280) - you deserved it (7932)

On 12/20/2013 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by zamwow (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53193) - you deserved it (4609)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

#20975074
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45748) - you deserved it (11228)

On 11/29/2013 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

#20974515
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56103) - you deserved it (6076)

On 11/29/2013 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67029) - you deserved it (5572)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)



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