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JoshuaB

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JoshuaB

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 138
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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JoshuaB's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

#19136346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34149) - you deserved it (4988)

On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing that song that goes 'I'm too sexy for my shirt' when we have sex. Now, every time that we have sex, that song is going to be stuck in my head. FML

#19005217
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7854) - you deserved it (34762)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by tkr (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while in bed with my fiancée, I asked her to take off her pants so we could get it on. She said, "No, I don't feel like squeezing into them again." I was cockblocked by a pair of jeans. FML

#18974719
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (4928)

On 02/02/2012 at 4:31am - intimacy - by DieTrying - United States (California)

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55143) - you deserved it (4239)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

#18954927
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30945) - you deserved it (4973)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend woefully admitted that she thinks of me more as a brother than as a boyfriend, all while I was still inside her. FML

#18927018
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36693) - you deserved it (2900)

On 01/27/2012 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML

#18921223
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25103) - you deserved it (2614)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:07pm - misc - by HylianFox (woman) - United States

Today, I had a swollen knee, and was slowly limping to the toilet. All of a sudden, my mom ran past me, beating me to it. As she closed the door, she said, "AT LEAST I CAN RUN!" FML

#18917504
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25709) - you deserved it (2622) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/26/2012 at 5:08pm - health - by Jen_ - France

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41239) - you deserved it (3376)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

#18891781
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41239) - you deserved it (3376)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States

Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML

#18878139
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26105) - you deserved it (6540)

On 01/22/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was kicked out of a comedy club for laughing too loudly. FML

#18877531
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29613) - you deserved it (7049)

On 01/22/2012 at 3:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML

#18876048
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38091) - you deserved it (2280)

On 01/22/2012 at 12:09am - kids - by thosedamnkids (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was texting a guy that one of my friends told me about. She gave me his number and told me about how he was deaf. Three hours into great conversation I forgot and asked him what his favorite music was. FML

#18875593
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24578) - you deserved it (10246)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:17pm - love - by Scumbagmemory (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML

#18867304
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14642) - you deserved it (25755)

On 01/21/2012 at 12:47am - love - by Reliena (woman) - United States (Washington)



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