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JoseIsAdork

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JoseIsAdork
  • Town/Country : oz, Us
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 January 1987 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 525
  • Number of comments : 204
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About JoseIsAdork : I'm a really laid back guy, I laugh and joke a lot and unless its absolutely necessary then I try not to be overly serious about things. life is too short to not enjoy our time here. I love reading all the FML's and such so I'm on here a ton. I'm a coffee addict, certified nerd, zombie extraordinaire, love video games, music of all sorts. I love dogs and just about any animals. pizza is my food of choice haha. feel free to send me a message and say hello if you want to!

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JoseIsAdork's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a new, expensive dress for a date. I left the tag on and hidden in hopes of returning it later. Someone saw it and ripped it off for me to "save me from embarrassment." FML

#21031476
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23457) - you deserved it (48721)

On 01/18/2014 at 3:33am - money - by unicorn_skies - United States (California)

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

#21031072
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38772) - you deserved it (5068)

On 01/17/2014 at 6:28pm - health - by SqueakingRetard (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that if you are dreaming that you have diarrhea, you probably have diarrhea. FML

#21030771
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41794) - you deserved it (3840)

On 01/17/2014 at 11:24am - health - by crap - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My boyfriend thinks I'm faking the whole thing in revenge for the fight we had yesterday. FML

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

#21028727
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47784) - you deserved it (7960)

On 01/15/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

#21020397
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47284) - you deserved it (4298)

On 01/07/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I mentioned to my boyfriend that I want to start working out and get rid of my holiday weight. His response? "Okay, just don't join a gym. People will have to see you there." FML

#21020071
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38878) - you deserved it (3890)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:41am - love - by fat - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

#21019231
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54285) - you deserved it (6698)

On 01/06/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by innocent - Australia

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

#21019190
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43477) - you deserved it (13255)

On 01/06/2014 at 3:57pm - misc - by Mels (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML

#21019101
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41354) - you deserved it (8493)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by CatLady - United States (California)

Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML

#21019092
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41976) - you deserved it (4160)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend is still obsessed with me. Apparently he named his dog after me and talks to her like she's a real person. FML

#21018719
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43975) - you deserved it (4592)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:17am - intimacy - by Seriously? -

Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML

#21018030
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49415) - you deserved it (6101)

On 01/05/2014 at 4:45pm - health - by stillhurting (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, despite all of the pictures and proof of my fiancé, my parents still think I have an imaginary boyfriend. They met him, and were there when he proposed. They think it's all a joke. FML

#21017461
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50010) - you deserved it (3306)

On 01/05/2014 at 2:11am - love - by Fiancé problemsss - United States (Montana)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46028) - you deserved it (4519)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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