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Jonny_Blaze0017

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Jonny_Blaze0017

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2885
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Jonny_Blaze0017 : Life is a gift; that must be why we live in the present
Also- remember to laugh every once in awhile


P.S.- I'm not the one on the left

Jonny_Blaze0017's page activity

Visits<b>da_best_eva</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:30pm<b>sar135</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 8:16am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 7:42pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:55pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:48am<b>teotsi</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 2:34pm<b>Reggaman</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 6:36am<b>vickypumkin</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 6:33am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 10:15am<b>username71</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 11:28pm<b>Palindromesque</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 6:31am<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 4:48pm<b>miiapaige</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 10:20pm<b>xXNerrrdXx</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 1:21am<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 2:45pm<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 6:03am<b>0void0</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 7:23am<b>dieselfreak123</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 10:06pm

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Jonny_Blaze0017's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a letter in the mail saying I'm being sued by the guy that broke into my house last week. When I walked in and saw him, I tackled him, punched him in the face a time or two, and restrained him with zip ties. I now have to pay for his broken nose and face charges of assault. FML

#6195343
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46621) - you deserved it (4232)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:01pm - misc - by ShouldHaveLetHimTakeTheTV (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I failed an oral speech because "I didn't look up once." The problem was, every time I looked up, my teacher looked down. Every time I looked down, she looked up. FML

#6007391
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32831) - you deserved it (5856)

On 10/26/2009 at 2:46pm - misc - by oralMistake - United States (Maryland)

Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML

#5971935
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40182) - you deserved it (5997)

On 10/24/2009 at 9:14am - love - by Oops (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

#5954141
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11635) - you deserved it (43962)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I texted my brother saying "Always remember I love you! Never forget it!" to which he answered: "You better not be doing drugs." FML

#5933276
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24814) - you deserved it (8949)

On 10/21/2009 at 7:21pm - love - by Lovelysister (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML

#5861611
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35882) - you deserved it (4593)

On 10/17/2009 at 2:26am - health - by JoJo - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that if you let your son install a new shower head, he won't tighten it properly. So when you turn the shower on, it will shoot out at rocket speed, hitting you in the face. Then when you grab the shower handle to prevent yourself falling backwards, you will just rip that out and hit your head again. FML

#5858229
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31442) - you deserved it (4667)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by Ndanick1193 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML

#5820033
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8271) - you deserved it (39505)

On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

#5710708
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30371) - you deserved it (3337)

On 10/07/2009 at 8:38pm - misc - by dangerousknitter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I left home to start my new life at University. Saying goodbye to my mother, the last thing she said to me was "Don't turn gay". I'm gay. FML

#5562367
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48205) - you deserved it (9992)

On 09/30/2009 at 5:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML

#5407615
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37971) - you deserved it (15323)

On 09/22/2009 at 12:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML

#5309221
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22353) - you deserved it (77911)

On 09/17/2009 at 6:57am - work - by auscop (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27108) - you deserved it (4933)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML

#5276065
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61590) - you deserved it (3538)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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