Jonny_Blaze0017

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Jonny_Blaze0017

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Jonny_Blaze0017
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10563
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Jonny_Blaze0017 : Laughter is healing, so make sure you have an outlet to relieve stress


Jonny_Blaze0017's page activity

Visits<b>thisisnotused</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 4:30pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 5:52pm<b>ChiefRK</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:05pm<b>18emikot</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 8:30pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 6:32pm<b>doge5</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 5:10pm<b>turtlefreak23</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 4:18pm<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 4:02pm<b>rfish14</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 1:49pm<b>OlRed</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 1:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>kristihek10</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 4:53pm<b>bigwell</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:29pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 6:37pm<b>mf727hihi</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:00pm<b>orios105</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 1:24am<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 5:29am<b>afisxfallxchild</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 1:54pm

Fucked!<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:06am

Jonny_Blaze0017's FML badges

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I agree, their lives suck

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Jonny_Blaze0017's favorite FMLs

Today, I borrowed my 23-year-old son's laptop. The sticky keyboard gave me a good idea of his browsing history. FML

by NiquetChrome / 04/14/2013 at 7:18pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health

Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 6:29am / Health

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 12:59am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML

by Anon / 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation

Today, while at a hospital, a prayer group circled me and started praying that God and the good doctors and nurses would heal me from the disease that disfigured my face. I was there to visit my sick grandmother. FML

by chinatownhobo / 04/08/2013 at 2:12am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Health

Today, my dad had a little too much to drink. When he's that drunk, he likes to pepper me with a lot of random questions. He asked if I've ever tried hard drugs, and if I want to die. I answered no to both of the questions, and he demanded to know why not. FML

by yeah why not / 04/06/2013 at 1:06pm / Norway / Miscellaneous

Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML

by Evalynne / 04/06/2013 at 8:55am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

by confusedcatlover / 04/06/2013 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 9:26pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Work

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

by The_Black_Jesus / 03/31/2013 at 9:32am / United States / Kids

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

by sarajj / 03/29/2013 at 5:36pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

by everyoneheard / 03/28/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I casually mentioned to my mom that my boyfriend of two years and I were thinking about moving in together. She looked me dead in the eye and said if I ever moved out, she'd throw me out of the house. I'm confused. FML

by Imafishyfishy / 03/27/2013 at 2:47am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML

by whykarma / 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals