Jonny_Blaze0017

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Jonny_Blaze0017

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Jonny_Blaze0017
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10550
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Jonny_Blaze0017 : Laughter is healing, so make sure you have an outlet to relieve stress


Jonny_Blaze0017's page activity

Visits<b>thisisnotused</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 4:30pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 5:52pm<b>ChiefRK</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:05pm<b>18emikot</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 8:30pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 6:32pm<b>doge5</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 5:10pm<b>turtlefreak23</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 4:18pm<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 4:02pm<b>rfish14</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 1:49pm<b>OlRed</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 1:25pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>kristihek10</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 4:53pm<b>bigwell</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:29pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 6:37pm<b>mf727hihi</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:00pm<b>orios105</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 1:24am<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 5:29am<b>afisxfallxchild</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 1:54pm

Fucked!<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:06am

Jonny_Blaze0017's FML badges

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Jonny_Blaze0017's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

by sumhub94 / 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm / United States / Work

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I realized my favorite pen advertises a vaginal cream. I've been letting people borrow it for months. FML

by MrConcise / 05/01/2013 at 12:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 5:17am / Love

Today, I was excited for my first date in a while, with a "tall handsome business man." Turns out he "doesn't feel emotions anymore", likes getting peed on, and "doesn't do condoms." Thanks, internet dating. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2013 at 11:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML

by BestBF / 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, I removed the side rails from my truck because I didn't think I really needed them. An hour later, I went to Wal-Mart, forgot they were gone, and busted my ass in public while getting out of my truck. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 12:06pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Love

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

by reyoflight / 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Kids

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

by thanks, my fellow americans / 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML

by Cupcakes / 04/15/2013 at 1:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML

by lonely / 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm / United States / Love