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An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27506) - you deserved it (3131)
On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)
Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24666) - you deserved it (3874)
On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19628) - you deserved it (4679)
On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31431) - you deserved it (1963)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went on a date with a co-worker I've been interested in for some time. The topic of discussion she chose over lunch: how she's living a double-life as an escort in Flint and that she thinks she's picked up an STD from unprotected sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (3095)
On 01/22/2013 at 12:20pm - love - by SonofDonald (man) - United States
Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31608) - you deserved it (2059)
On 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm - misc - by daddy's girl - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I dragged my boyfriend to see Les Misérables with me. He now refuses to communicate with me through any medium other than singing. Apparently, this is his revenge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11646) - you deserved it (33665)
On 01/21/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by lesson.learned (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23708) - you deserved it (1575) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32017) - you deserved it (3559)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic
Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23505) - you deserved it (1215)
On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found my dogs freezing outside. My neighbor was supposed to watch them while I was away, and on my way home I called to let her know she should let them have a quick walk. She thought I'd be home soon enough that she wouldn't have to let them back in. It was minus 10c out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28994) - you deserved it (3314)
Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16883) - you deserved it (2453)
On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, at work, I saw a van in our car park with "Hurlz Wagon" painted on its side. Laughing, I told the customer who owned it that I loved the name, and I asked was there a funny vomit story behind it. She didn't laugh, and told me it was her family name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10963) - you deserved it (6933)
On 09/26/2012 at 7:40am - work - by big mouth (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I had my girlfriend over to meet my parents. After dinner, we were in the living room talking. My dad thought it would be funny to grab our cat, stick it down his shirt, then pretend to give birth to it, with sound effects. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16451) - you deserved it (1374)
On 09/13/2012 at 8:37am - misc - by Sprtsgeek13 - United States (Maine)
Today, I had to slowly explain to my best friend that when babies are born, the umbilical cord is attached to the baby's belly-button, not the mother's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12734) - you deserved it (969)
On 08/22/2012 at 4:36pm - misc - by baffled (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)
Monday 20 May 2013
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