JohnzSexyMamas11

Search for a member

JohnzSexyMamas11

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2946
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About JohnzSexyMamas11 : Im A Pretty Laid Back Chick .. iLove Shopping & Texting & Messaging & iLove Reading Books That Make Me Laugh So Much That iCry .. iLove My Lil Puppy She Is A Pain Though .. iLove Haters & iLove Dinosaurs & Hello Kitty .. iWatch Tv Alot Cause iDont Go To School iAm Home Schooled & iLike Walking Around My Houses .. iCan Be An Outrageous Girl .. iDont Care Who You Are Ill Say What iWant If You Dont Like It Then You Know Where The Door Is :) .. iLove Neon Colors & Pink & Red & Black & Grey & Purple & White .. iLove Rock, Country, Hip Hop, Well All Kinds Except Jazz & Blues .. iHave Lots Of Blonde Moments Lmao .. iLove Zebra Print & Leopard Print .. iLove Drawing & Writing Letter .. If You Wanna Know Anything Else Just Ask

JohnzSexyMamas11's page activity

Visits<b>samrompain</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 3:59pm<b>enter______name</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:55pm<b>Adman567</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 8:09am<b>Caps_hockey</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 6:22pm<b>YNWA</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 3:22am<b>Andromeda13</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 8:21pm<b>megpie20693</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 3:27pm<b>taxlor</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 3:53pm<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 6:23pm<b>UnvalidMistakes</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:29pm<b>army_of_misfits</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 9:08pm<b>seniorchang</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 1:07am<b>waffule365</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 7:14pm<b>sanchitgoyal</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 8:42am<b>watchme</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 6:45pm<b>DirkTheDiggler</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 10:36pm<b>carry_on</b> - the 04/19/2013 at 12:05pm<b>neilykins</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 10:16am

JohnzSexyMamas11's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of JohnzSexyMamas11's badges

JohnzSexyMamas11's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML

by AbandonedHouseWife / 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me that the main reason he was dating me was because he was intimidated by pretty girls. FML

by Lisa / 10/01/2012 at 5:09pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my husband of five years left me for a woman ten years older than himself who lives nine hours away. He met her online two weeks ago while playing Call of Duty. FML

by strawberrywine22 / 09/27/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I found out that, for over three years, my boyfriend has solely been dating me to get closer to my mom. Apparently, "she's a total MILF." FML

by daughter / 09/18/2012 at 12:25am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

by FutureMarine3658 / 08/08/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I slammed the car door on my head while I was getting in the car. If that wasn't bad enough, my boyfriend is convinced I now have a concussion and insists on waking me up every hour to make sure I'm still alive. FML

by MAC. / 08/04/2012 at 5:33am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

by totallyembarassed / 07/07/2012 at 12:08am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came out of the closet. I came out on Facebook to spare myself awkward conversations and gossip. I wrote a deeply meaningful status about my partner and my pride in who I was. The only responses were, "Lol", "Hacked", and similar remarks. FML

by OutOfTheCloset / 06/02/2012 at 2:50am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my 22-year-old boyfriend blow his nose into his hand, then wipe his snot on our couch. There was a box of tissues directly in front of him. FML

by rozziepop / 03/30/2012 at 1:37am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

by anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 1:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I forgot to grab toilet paper on the way home from work. Since I don't have a car and all of my friends have plans for Valentine's Day I'm now down to wiping with cotton balls. FML

by no tp / 02/14/2012 at 8:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2012 at 12:31am / United States / Intimacy

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to slight memory of my boyfriend leaving for work an hour earlier than originally planned due to "excessive sweat" in my bed. When I removed my sheets and took in a deep whiff, my olfactory receptors instantly knew that his so called "sweat" was actually his urine. FML

by dontpeeonmenxtime / 12/29/2011 at 9:51am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous