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JocelynKaulitz

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JocelynKaulitz
  • Town/Country : California, US
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 August 1994 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2451
  • Number of comments : 273
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About JocelynKaulitz : Name's Jocelyn

Call me Jocy for short :)

Get to know meeee

Msg me! I like convos, very mucho!

The end.

:)

You may go about your day now.

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JocelynKaulitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

#17893570
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25778) - you deserved it (1967)

On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14711) - you deserved it (36635)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, my obnoxious mother-in-law berated me in front of my husband's family for still working while pregnant. She says I'm harming the baby by not quitting. I'm only 4 months pregnant and I work as a nurse at a hospital. FML

#17556987
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23506) - you deserved it (1538)

On 08/23/2011 at 10:51am - health - by monsterinlaw (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML

#17547713
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23400) - you deserved it (2135)

On 08/22/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by rene - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked the girl I like to send me 'yummy pictures.' I got a picture of cheesecake. FML

#17213168
366 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8457) - you deserved it (71690)

On 07/22/2011 at 2:29am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML

#17188633
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12157) - you deserved it (31196)

On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28666) - you deserved it (5800)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, after 14 rice-filled days in China, I came back home. What's for lunch? Rice. FML

#17120359
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21550) - you deserved it (6904)

On 07/15/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by panos016 - United Kingdom

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24799) - you deserved it (79121)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62950) - you deserved it (5691)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I updated my facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML

#17074594
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30327) - you deserved it (7032)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by _Emilyy - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to spice up our sex life, so we went and had sex in the park. We had 30 minutes of "spice", just to spend seven hours in jail. FML

#16954796
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10821) - you deserved it (32830)

On 07/02/2011 at 11:01pm - intimacy - by T-Guy (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

#16918734
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43997) - you deserved it (3611)

On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
434 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54316) - you deserved it (4978)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to a concert with my boyfriend. I was repeatedly ass-grabbed, grinded on and hit on by guys. My boyfriend's response was, "As long as they continue to bring you free beer, let them get a little feel of what they are paying for." FML

#16674026
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33928) - you deserved it (7554)

On 06/15/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by unknown - United States (California)



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