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JocelynKaulitz

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JocelynKaulitz

48Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9413
  • Number of comments : 443
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About JocelynKaulitz : Just keeping it irie.

Name's Jocelyn!

JocelynKaulitz's page activity

Visits<b>Alixari</b> - 13 hours ago<b>MetalxSoldier</b> - 19 hours ago<b>Fennex3</b> - 24 hours ago<b>whereismyb4con</b> - yesterday at 1:09am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - yesterday at 12:15am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 4:03pm<b>badnelly123</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 1:16pm<b>kingkobrastrikes</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 11:13am<b>sweetnsourrr</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:41pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 8:36am<b>helloyes</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 6:58am<b>reezy1978</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 10:16pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 5:21pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 12:49pm<b>Dosenpfand</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 11:35am<b>dariella</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 1:10am<b>Zowada1</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:45pm<b>averagefosho</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 3:28pm

Liked!<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:11am<b>Hertyn</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:09am<b>papygeorges</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:00am<b>allstarrider</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 1:24pm<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 1:08pm<b>tyler1916</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 2:00pm<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:20am<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 8:49am<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 10:17am<b>Murkyy</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:40pm<b>mikethekid</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 9:56pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 1:38pm<b>whereismyb4con</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 11:46am<b>skyttlz</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 9:19am<b>isaias56</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 8:41pm<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 5:08pm<b>twistedtwincity</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 4:43pm<b>jelrid</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 2:49pm

JocelynKaulitz's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of JocelynKaulitz's badges

JocelynKaulitz's favorite FMLs

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

#21091737
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39340) - you deserved it (4426)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm - work - by systematicpanic (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37436) - you deserved it (4966)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML

#21089774
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53944) - you deserved it (6531)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:14am - intimacy - by tiredofcrazy (woman) - Australia

Today, I was walking and saw a quarter. I bent down to pick it up. Barely a foot ahead there was another, so I crawled over to get it. This continued for about six feet when I realize a kid was laying them out in a trail. I had collected 7 fake quarters and the kid had it on video. FML

#21087786
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40646) - you deserved it (19515)

On 03/15/2014 at 11:46pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML

#21075644
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47291) - you deserved it (6692)

On 03/02/2014 at 3:44am - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was babysitting my 4-year-old cousin. She scraped her knee, and in an attempt to cheer her up, I put a refrigerator box over my head and waddled around like a penguin. She stopped crying, but only after I fell down a flight of tile stairs. FML

Today, my boss fired me. I can't really explain the slap I gave him for it, though. FML

#21072136
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (33659) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/26/2014 at 4:45am - work - by sistermonster (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41976) - you deserved it (3942)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML

#21068474
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48311) - you deserved it (7497)

On 02/22/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by coppervains (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I saw a photo on my mother-in-law's Facebook, proudly showing off the horrible job she'd done of painting her car. I sarcastically commented that I wouldn't inflict that on my worst enemy's ride. An hour later, she came by and emptied a bucket of paint over my windshield. FML

#21066687
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24561) - you deserved it (47884)

On 02/20/2014 at 4:20pm - misc - by time to lawyer up (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

#21062623
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22357) - you deserved it (39471)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by extra crispy or original recipe (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

#21057252
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39447) - you deserved it (23073)

On 02/11/2014 at 3:00pm - misc - by FUUUUCK (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at work, a customer asked me to unlock the restroom for them. I honestly couldn't figure out which gender they were, but I didn't want to be rude and ask, so I took a chance. I unlocked the wrong one. FML

#21056381
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43977) - you deserved it (5217)

On 02/10/2014 at 3:48pm - work - by elizabethkalyn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML

#21056297
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37757) - you deserved it (19486)

On 02/10/2014 at 1:57pm - misc - by Shooting myself - United States (Illinois)



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