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JocelynKaulitz

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JocelynKaulitz

30Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8243
  • Number of comments : 428
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About JocelynKaulitz : Working customer service at Target for over a year has made me hate people.

Name's Jocelyn.

I feel more satisfied when my comments get thumbed down rather than thumbed up, it's different.

JocelynKaulitz's page activity

Visits<b>A07</b> - 8 hours ago<b>ScottVining</b> - 8 hours ago<b>pitbull3k</b> - 12 hours ago<b>eatsteak</b> - 21 hours ago<b>dk1991</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 12:49pm<b>kingbubbles</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 3:40am<b>breaking6883</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 4:13pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:27pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:34am<b>sirrubberduckie</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:03am<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 10:32pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:34pm<b>emily1015</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:30pm<b>shinklefly</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 5:43pm<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 5:15pm<b>FBellesLife</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:56pm<b>Ruskiy_Cherep</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 3:15pm<b>facelick</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 2:23pm

Liked!<b>FBellesLife</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:51am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:05am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 6:35pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 3:22pm<b>RA91</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 11:31pm<b>jalenthesamoan</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:29pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 4:03am<b>anonymousguy1569</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:57am<b>Sophie_K</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 9:55pm<b>osr215</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 11:08pm<b>yeatesj</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 12:17pm<b>whatshisname1066</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 9:16am<b>gary3768</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:36am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:17am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 8:07pm<b>CCRider</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 7:29am<b>kyle8211</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 12:38am<b>cassiecassie559</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:23am

JocelynKaulitz's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of JocelynKaulitz's badges

JocelynKaulitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML

#21068474
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48234) - you deserved it (7491)

On 02/22/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by coppervains (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I saw a photo on my mother-in-law's Facebook, proudly showing off the horrible job she'd done of painting her car. I sarcastically commented that I wouldn't inflict that on my worst enemy's ride. An hour later, she came by and emptied a bucket of paint over my windshield. FML

#21066687
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24541) - you deserved it (47853)

On 02/20/2014 at 4:20pm - misc - by time to lawyer up (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

#21062623
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (39358)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by extra crispy or original recipe (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

#21057252
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39399) - you deserved it (23049)

On 02/11/2014 at 3:00pm - misc - by FUUUUCK (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at work, a customer asked me to unlock the restroom for them. I honestly couldn't figure out which gender they were, but I didn't want to be rude and ask, so I took a chance. I unlocked the wrong one. FML

#21056381
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43941) - you deserved it (5215)

On 02/10/2014 at 3:48pm - work - by elizabethkalyn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML

#21056297
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37727) - you deserved it (19474)

On 02/10/2014 at 1:57pm - misc - by Shooting myself - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dogs freaked out and started getting violent because they thought the sound of my vibrator was the other's growling. FML

#21048300
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40983) - you deserved it (10328)

On 02/02/2014 at 4:50pm - animals - by foops (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

#21044466
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49057) - you deserved it (21588)

On 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41467) - you deserved it (12510)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was reading FML's birthday blog post and saw a picture of myself in it. I would've been happy if it wasn't #4 in the list of worst duckfaces of the week. FML

#21040870
166 comments

Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML

#21030815
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37439) - you deserved it (4753)

On 01/17/2014 at 12:35pm - misc - by my cheese grater + your dick (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my boss hung a dartboard in his office. It has a printout of my employee photo taped to it. FML

#21023884
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38183) - you deserved it (4424)

On 01/10/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by lk mm, n vwls (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML

#21022453
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57592) - you deserved it (6961)

On 01/09/2014 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26976) - you deserved it (35144)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML

#21017728
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42217) - you deserved it (34281)

On 01/05/2014 at 11:16am - love - by give me an F - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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