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JocelynKaulitz

Offline (the 06/30/2015 at 1:44am) | Search for a member

JocelynKaulitz

73Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12503
  • Number of comments : 455
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About JocelynKaulitz : Just keeping it irie.

Name's Jocelyn!

JocelynKaulitz's page activity

Visits<b>daddysgirl243</b> - 10 hours ago<b>CreepinCow</b> - 12 hours ago<b>lulumars</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:07am<b>Malfano0214</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 12:56am<b>Exodus9</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:08pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 7:11am<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:40am<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 6:28pm<b>sarika</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 4:45pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 10:05am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:41pm<b>lagreeni</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 5:58pm<b>Treken</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:18am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 4:46pm<b>fattdaddy</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 3:21pm<b>AlvvaysRedPilots</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:14pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:20am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 11:09am

Fucked!<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:11pm<b>Sam_Dchi</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:57pm<b>juice_33</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 4:29pm<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 12:09pm<b>crazy_loner</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 11:23am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:04am<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 1:41pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:21am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 7:34am<b>Raltizal</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:22pm<b>NH_Freelancer</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 5:19am<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 5:35am<b>ali282h</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 3:31am<b>rjc490</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:58pm<b>tot5t</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 8:00pm<b>natyemi15</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 5:08pm<b>erjgyflover</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 8:25pm<b>atrumX</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 8:07am

JocelynKaulitz's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of JocelynKaulitz's badges

JocelynKaulitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47328) - you deserved it (4104)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML

#20066447
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21499) - you deserved it (7393)

On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States

Today, it was my first day back at school. My social anxiety is so bad that I couldn't even raise my hand to use the bathroom because I didn't want people to look at me. FML

#20057693
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20664) - you deserved it (4028)

On 09/04/2012 at 5:55pm - health - by freakingout (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after a visit with my mom, I started feeling sick. I meant to send her a text asking if she had gotten sick lately, but I accidentally sent a text asking if she had gotten dick lately. FML

#20054615
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27975) - you deserved it (4638)

On 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

#20051346
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21850) - you deserved it (4343)

On 08/31/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, my boyfriend came over to see me after almost a month of us not spending time together. Unfortunately, he came straight from bar-hopping with his friends and was wasted. He's currently naked in bed, cooing at his penis, and giggling like a little girl. FML

#20044244
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24979) - you deserved it (3158)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:57am - love - by kvdfan (woman) - United States

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37402) - you deserved it (10885) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, after his second week of babysitting, my boyfriend has begun the disturbing habit of saying, "Ready or not, here I come!" every time he's about to orgasm. He doesn't see why this doesn't appeal to me. FML

#20032910
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26323) - you deserved it (2836)

On 08/20/2012 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by majorlyturnedoff (woman) - United States

Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML

#20031010
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33714) - you deserved it (3733)

On 08/19/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by Lauren - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49852) - you deserved it (3598)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML

#20015021
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25059) - you deserved it (7842)

On 08/11/2012 at 10:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

#20014116
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30955) - you deserved it (2133)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm - health - by dumbasdogshit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML

#20006198
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8098) - you deserved it (30151)

On 08/06/2012 at 6:08pm - misc - by :$ - Canada (Ontario)



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