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Jkenow

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Jkenow

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 December 1997 (16 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 844
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Jkenow's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML

#21133162
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35501) - you deserved it (8910)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:55am - misc - by Bad Artist - United States

Today, my best friend wanted to see what my new boyfriend looks like. By chance, he'd sent me a Snapchat a few minutes before, so I opened it to show her, only to see that it was a dick pic. FML

#21132642
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33198) - you deserved it (39164)

On 05/06/2014 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49679) - you deserved it (18110)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after finishing a two hour essay exam that will determine the future of my career, I realized I misread the question. FML

#21132154
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46085) - you deserved it (11483)

On 05/06/2014 at 5:11am - misc - by IBS (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend while my parents were out. After they got home, my dog brought out our used condom. FML

#21131413
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44851) - you deserved it (22458)

On 05/05/2014 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by PCJJacket - United States (California)

Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML

#21131182
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (220) - you deserved it (18516)

On 05/05/2014 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Zekrome - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I read that egg whites make a good hair treatment. Everything was going fine until, without thinking, I turned the hot water on to wash it out. I'm still picking the cooked egg out of my hair. FML

#21129302
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24609) - you deserved it (32308)

On 05/03/2014 at 12:57am - misc - by EggHead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

#21067130
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49002) - you deserved it (3948)

On 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm - misc - by BakedBat (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my brother and I took our cars to get oil changes. While we were there, a guy asked if we were dating. When we told him we were siblings, he responded with, "So?" FML

Today, my brother and I took our cars to get oil changes. While we were there, a guy asked if we were dating. When we told him we were siblings, he responded with, "So?" FML

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, the highlight of my day was when I figured out that my little brother's toy dump truck could actually dump stuff out. I'm 18. FML

#21048030
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35207) - you deserved it (6988)

On 02/02/2014 at 11:13am - misc - by LarissaT18 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I invited my best friend to sleep on my couch while he looks for a new place. He walked inside, dropped his stuff on the floor and asked me my policy on hookers. I laughed it off as a joke. Half an hour later my doorbell rang. He took my laughter as a yes. FML

#21047796
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40601) - you deserved it (6277)

On 02/02/2014 at 1:33am - misc - by tsukinoie - United States

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54331) - you deserved it (6008) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML

#21021758
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46909) - you deserved it (4498)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by loganHchrist - Canada (Manitoba)



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