Jjan04

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Offline (the 05/10/2016 at 8:47am)

Jjan04

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1519
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Jjan04 : Taken

Jjan04's page activity

Visits<b>functioning</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 12:28am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:03am<b>ajcrocks578</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 1:50am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:06am<b>gshocker20</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 7:52pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 1:58pm<b>chloecandies</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:26am<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:07am<b>annoyedchild</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 7:05am<b>NopeToThat</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 12:28am<b>noinspiration</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:40pm<b>aliceanon</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:37pm<b>IvonaNik</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 5:45pm<b>clrichmond2009</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:28pm<b>StevenMcCollum</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:06pm<b>theworstthing</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 3:27pm<b>tomwantssnow</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:46pm<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:13pm

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Jjan04's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML

by Female Struggles / 05/16/2014 at 7:20pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my mom showing her friends that she can deepthroat a banana. That's something I could've lived a long and happy life without seeing. FML

by fuck florida / 05/16/2014 at 3:26pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm / Mayotte / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

by ericabearr / 11/18/2013 at 3:14pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents, despite my long-standing protests. Over the next hour, they asked her if she'd ever considered becoming a swinger, why not, if she'd ever consider it in future, and to keep them in mind if she does. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2013 at 7:10pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML

by Colby / 11/15/2013 at 11:59am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

by SantaClaus / 11/02/2013 at 12:19am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

by Ashley / 10/07/2013 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was training at work on proper techniques of physical restraint. As my coworker was practicing on me, I realized this was the first time I've had physical contact with a man in years. I'm ashamed to admit how good it felt to feel his weight pressed into my back as I pretended to resist. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

by :( / 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy