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Jivesliven

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Jivesliven
  • Town/Country : Jacksonville, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 July 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 978
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Jivesliven's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML

#17903421
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML

#17903421
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML

#17903421
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31951) - you deserved it (3546)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML

#17894609
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24704) - you deserved it (4980)

On 10/03/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by Mike Polk - United States

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

#17893570
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30454) - you deserved it (2669)

On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

#17893570
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30454) - you deserved it (2669)

On 10/03/2011 at 2:08am - misc - by TheAnnoyedNeighbor - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

#17889582
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28394) - you deserved it (3695)

On 10/02/2011 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by rufusthepenis - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28075) - you deserved it (8450)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML

#17880810
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36272) - you deserved it (4727)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Patricia - United States (Texas)

Today, I logged on to Facebook to find that my boyfriend's relationship status had changed to in a relationship with his ex. I asked him about it, and all he said was, "I guess I forgot to break up with you." FML

#17880636
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33345) - you deserved it (2127)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my roommate was packing up her kitchen stuff as she prepared to move out. Apparently that includes the majority of things I bought last week to replace all of her stuff she is taking. FML

#17870431
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20511) - you deserved it (2316)

On 09/30/2011 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was called a pervert. On a phone sex line. FML

#17857316
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13098) - you deserved it (38103)

On 09/28/2011 at 6:16pm - intimacy - by Hypocrisy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27776) - you deserved it (3437)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27776) - you deserved it (3437)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27776) - you deserved it (3437)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)



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