Jivesliven

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Offline (the 05/01/2016 at 1:05pm)

Jivesliven

2Fucked!

JiveslivenJivesliven
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 July 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6264
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Jivesliven's page activity

Visits<b>foxesntea</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 4:32pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 1:41pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:28pm<b>illmatic2</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 6:01am<b>Incroyalzz</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:39am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 5:03pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 5:18pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 1:23pm<b>Raxy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:59am<b>freezingmylife</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 4:00pm<b>CTPope74</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 7:59pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:42am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 2:55am<b>avarland</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 6:43am<b>thisgirl111111</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 3:58am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 3:19pm<b>chrisd007</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 11:10pm<b>Girosrabing</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 7:09pm

Fucked!<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:32am<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 7:23pm

Jivesliven's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Jivesliven's badges

Jivesliven's favorite FMLs

Today, after watching Hulk with my friends, we spent a good half hour discussing exactly how enlarged Bruce Banner's package would be in his Hulk state. I couldn't hide my excitement, and now my friends won't stop teasing me. FML

by rs / 06/30/2012 at 2:36pm / Egypt / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered my cat's favorite hobby: sitting butthole-first on my favorite makeup brush. FML

by audreyav / 06/30/2012 at 4:10am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, the school nurse called me in. She said she knew I was pregnant and she was worried about how it was affecting my grades. I'm not pregnant. Apparently I'm just stupid and fat. FML

by CharlieOrion / 05/04/2012 at 8:25am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML

by S12Sophia / 05/02/2012 at 6:06pm / France / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

by epicsquishii / 05/01/2012 at 7:02am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML

by kdehshaden / 04/30/2012 at 4:25am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML

by thyisnothorses / 04/28/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML

by Steve / 04/28/2012 at 9:57am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML

by poo4brains / 04/28/2012 at 12:42am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Intimacy

Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2012 at 12:41am / United States / Transportation

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

by yosenfal / 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm / United Kingdom (Plymouth) / Intimacy

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2012 at 11:24am / United States / Love

Today, I attempted to wax my "lady area". It hurt more than losing my virginity. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2012 at 3:18pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

by Jason199615 / 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm / United States (Missouri) / Love