Jivesliven

Search for a member

Offline (yesterday at 1:05pm)

Jivesliven

2Fucked!

JiveslivenJivesliven
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 July 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5081
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Jivesliven's page activity

Visits<b>foxesntea</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 4:32pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 1:41pm<b>Tiaxlnr</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:28pm<b>illmatic2</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 6:01am<b>Incroyalzz</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:39am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 5:03pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 5:18pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 1:23pm<b>Raxy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 1:59am<b>freezingmylife</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 4:00pm<b>CTPope74</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 7:59pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:42am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 2:55am<b>avarland</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 6:43am<b>thisgirl111111</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 3:58am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 3:19pm<b>chrisd007</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 11:10pm<b>Girosrabing</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 7:09pm

Fucked!<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:32am<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 7:23pm

Jivesliven's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Jivesliven's badges

Jivesliven's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML

by usmcgirl / 11/17/2009 at 10:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was minding a 6-year old boy. He begged me to take him somewhere. I rang his Mum, and she said I could. He picked to go to McDonald's. He ordered chicken. After his meal, he told me he was vegetarian, and wanted to try some meat while his Mum wasn't around. I got the blame. FML

by NewlyChildaphobic / 11/17/2009 at 9:50am / Ireland (Cork) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend came over to celebrate our anniversary. He had a card written in crayon with my name spelled wrong, and a basket I had seen his mother throw in the trash filled with flower petals ripped from my mom's garden. Our anniversary was 3 days ago. FML

by TLT / 11/16/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

by Molly / 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML

by squidwardpotatoes / 11/14/2009 at 6:08am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend of three years sent me a text saying: "I don't think we can see each other anymore, the nights were great, but I think I'm falling in love with Julie". I'm Julie. FML

by JJ / 11/13/2009 at 10:07pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, at my work, I was ringing though a kid's purchase. I try to be friendly with the kids and when he handed me his cash I said "Thank you, sir!" in a playful manner. He then turns to his mom and says "Mom, why does everyone think I am a boy?". FML

by DeeElleGee / 11/13/2009 at 7:09pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend made me shave my chest. Afterwards, she said I looked like I was 12. She won't have sex with me until it grows back. FML

by thelistman / 11/13/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML

by ournhd / 11/13/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML

by snapped / 11/12/2009 at 11:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML

by Falafax / 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm / United States / Work

Today, I was talking to a friend of mine over webcam, when I saw a scary looking man in a grey hoodie creeping around in the background. I loudly proclaimed "Paige! Who is that creepy looking guy behind you?" Turns out it was her mom. She heard everything. FML

by Sursion / 11/12/2009 at 12:34pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous