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Jirekianu2's favorite FMLs
by sickandtiredofit / 01/24/2012 at 2:50pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by emma209 / 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, my girlfriend told me we've just been fuck buddies for the entire year we've been "together." This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't working up the courage to propose to her on our anniversary. FML
by anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 10:59am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was accepted into a police academy. I called my girlfriend of 2 years, who was supportive through the process. She promptly broke up with me, stating, "You'll be really busy in the academy, and I can't marry a police officer. Its a dangerous job." And then called me selfish for "doing this to us." FML
by FuturePolice / 01/23/2012 at 4:56am / United States (California) / Work
by Jeff G. / 01/22/2012 at 7:31pm / United States (Arkansas) / Love
Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through my fence and striking the tree in my front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly asked me to give him a lift to work. He seemed confused by my speechlessness. FML
by Anonymous / 01/22/2012 at 12:57pm / United States (Nevada) / Transportation
by addicted2v / 01/21/2012 at 8:25am / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/16/2012 at 3:02pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, after over a year of lifestyle changes and a ritualistic exercise regime, I finally reached my goal weight. I excitedly told my boyfriend, and he responded, "Yeah, that's nice, but now your tits are tiny". FML
by Anonymous / 01/16/2012 at 8:10am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
by Anonymous / 01/15/2012 at 1:24am / United States (California) / Love
by 2gewd4u / 01/14/2012 at 8:24pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML
by Anonymous / 01/14/2012 at 6:40pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML
by me / 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 01/13/2012 at 5:58pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…
- Today, straight after we had sex, my boyfriend went to the bathroom. He stayed in there for a long… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.… Today, I’m a student in China, and I attended a welcoming party for the new students. It consisted…