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JimMorrisonROX

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JimMorrisonROX

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  • Number of visits : 356
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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JimMorrisonROX's page activity

Visits<b>ginger196</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 5:39pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 10:39pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 12:38am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 3:30am

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JimMorrisonROX's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24748) - you deserved it (22793)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38776) - you deserved it (6737)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

#21243162
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35231) - you deserved it (5606)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by lonely loser (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18228) - you deserved it (42123)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boss decided our 4 year relationship was unethical, so she broke up with me, then terminated my employment. FML

#21242835
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38078) - you deserved it (5298)

On 08/21/2014 at 11:53pm - love - by flyakite - United States

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

#21242552
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38664) - you deserved it (2508)

On 08/21/2014 at 3:30pm - misc - by stepshart - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41189) - you deserved it (7285)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

#21241796
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38205) - you deserved it (2824)

On 08/20/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by sonofaneuroticwench (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I'm getting married. I have a big poofy white dress and, oh yes, the shits. Here's hoping I can make it down the aisle without rushing off to the toilet. FML

#21241662
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38760) - you deserved it (2814)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:01pm - love - by ithinkicanmakeit - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41004) - you deserved it (15151)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38439) - you deserved it (7975) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47441) - you deserved it (4526)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

#21237829
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37784) - you deserved it (3153)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that my doctor wasn't kidding when he said "sudden diarrhea may occur" with my new medication. I learned this while walking my dog a mile away from my house. FML



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