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Jezzebel1

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Jezzebel1

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1551
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Jezzebel1's page activity

Visits<b>Baucis</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 3:34pm

Jezzebel1's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Jezzebel1's badges

Jezzebel1's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28891) - you deserved it (4971)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16642) - you deserved it (31548)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, a coworker and I pulled a April Fools' joke on our boss. She "borrowed" his keys and rolled down his window. I took a car window from a scrap yard and sprinkled it on the ground near his door. His response was to kick the nearest object in anger. The nearest object happened to be my car. FML

#21385709
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24121) - you deserved it (9814)

On 04/01/2015 at 1:46pm - work - by TecheyTim - United States (New York)

Today, an old man walked up to me, said, "Hey missy, you wanna see an antique?" and winked. FML

#21384188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27518) - you deserved it (2336)

On 03/30/2015 at 2:39pm - misc - by noantiquesforme - United States (California)

Today, I had to teach my grandma how to burn files to CDs. I jokingly said that it doesn't involve literally burning the disks in fire, to which she responded by slapping me and calling me a patronizing brat. FML

#21383501
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22973) - you deserved it (12444)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44196) - you deserved it (2942)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I was trying out for a position as pitcher for my college baseball team. I threw the ball as hard as I could, and then collapsed to the ground in agony from a dislocated shoulder. FML

#21382575
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27165) - you deserved it (4606)

On 03/27/2015 at 6:50pm - health - by Bonecrusher (man) - United States (California)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38200) - you deserved it (3121)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my co-workers referring to me as "Uncle Fester". This is apparently my nickname around the office, and has been for nearly three years. I had no idea. FML

#21380389
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25481) - you deserved it (2377)

On 03/23/2015 at 9:49pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

Today, it was my first day working as a pharmacist. I quickly discovered that customers not only think that it makes me qualified to offer free medical advice, but they also have no qualms about showing me their various lumps, bumps, and vaginal leakages. FML

#21377662
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182) - you deserved it (3127)

On 03/19/2015 at 9:19am - work - by MyPoorEyes (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while camping, I was given the sex talk, along with visuals created with marshmallows and a roasting fork. FML

#21377041
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27832) - you deserved it (2560)

On 03/18/2015 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

#21367918
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29) - you deserved it (74)

On 03/04/2015 at 10:03am - health - by actually just constipated.. and stupid - Tunisia

Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezed. I managed to honk the horn and the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21361311
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32337) - you deserved it (4780)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by headache - United States



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