Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jessi416

Search for a member

Jessi416

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 605
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Jessi416 : I love my Tyler. I love my friends. I love my family. I love my life. I love you and I love humanity.

Jessi416's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Jessi416's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48480) - you deserved it (17709)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got into my car and realised that my CDs were no longer in my glove box. According to the police, the random key code for my car type has been cracked, and thieves can now let themselves in whenever they want. The manufacturer says they can't do anything about it. FML

#13158872
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28306) - you deserved it (2747)

On 09/22/2010 at 5:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21204) - you deserved it (2434)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my friend told me men can't be trusted. I told her that wasn't true; I have my husband's password to his email but I never check it because I trust him. She bet me he was doing something bad, and to prove her wrong I looked. Turns out he has been cheating on me for 8 months. FML

#7316250
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38926) - you deserved it (4929)

On 01/13/2010 at 7:40am - love - by BetrayedGirl (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to see a play. I'm pregnant, so I always need to pee. At intermission, I ran to use the bathroom, but there was a really long line. I asked the woman in front of me if I could pass her. She responded, "You don't look pregnant!", and lectured me about lying while I peed my pants. FML

#6737603
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38317) - you deserved it (2633)

On 12/13/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by justine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to check out my school's quarterback's Twitter, since we have a class together. He wrote, "Dear girl in front of me, I thought you were pretty until you turned around." It was funny, until I realized the timestamp was when we have class together, and I sit in front of him. FML

#5186777
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36670) - you deserved it (4360)

On 09/11/2009 at 1:05pm - misc - by thatgirl247 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

#4555505
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58254) - you deserved it (2789)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my friend has been texting my long distance boyfriend more than I do. When I confronted her about it, she confessed that it was because they had been planning a surprise appearance for me. I've never been surprised before, and I ruined my own surprise. FML

#4517705
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15677) - you deserved it (42308)

On 08/14/2009 at 1:29am - misc - by neverbeensurprised (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

#3142518
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27349) - you deserved it (79004)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, I was at the gym and I saw a really cute guy working out nearby. I tried to get his attention by taking off my shirt and smiling at him. When he walked over to me, instead of asking for my number, he just said "Can you please put that back on? Thanks". FML

#1607608
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17177) - you deserved it (51645)

On 05/03/2009 at 8:36pm - misc - by Gjkashldf (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn’t even move. FML

#897879
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55746) - you deserved it (8798)

On 04/10/2009 at 4:17am - misc - by missy (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

#644123
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82596) - you deserved it (16353)

On 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by badmom (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: