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JesseN

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JesseN

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 July 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1122
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>sexaaydino</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 1:24pm<b>badluckdawson</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 4:28am<b>Faith13</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 3:13pm<b>Scro</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 10:22am<b>MonsterBunnie</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 3:15am

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JesseN's favorite FMLs

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

#17499822
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34425) - you deserved it (6822)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25897) - you deserved it (2535)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML

#17253046
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12320) - you deserved it (56525)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38073) - you deserved it (5258)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML

#17167728
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33422) - you deserved it (11349)

On 07/18/2011 at 8:36pm - kids - by stargirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36339) - you deserved it (5991)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at the bakery section of my local supermarket, I heard the beat of what I assumed was a song playing. I really got into it, and bobbed my head and danced a little. After getting some strange looks, I realized the "beat" was a machine mixing frosting. FML

#15287588
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11356) - you deserved it (36732)

On 03/12/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized I'm pussy whipped by a chick I'm not even dating. FML

#14550494
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12105) - you deserved it (36509)

On 01/12/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by mad dude -

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

#14199411
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14373) - you deserved it (27029)

On 12/14/2010 at 4:26am - health - by shit (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. When I orgasmed, my leg flew out and I accidentally kicked him in the balls. For the next ten minutes, he lay in the fetal position. FML

#14161331
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26909) - you deserved it (19231)

On 12/11/2010 at 1:00am - intimacy - by caligirl921 - United States

Today, I found out that even if you have to go really bad, never burst into a bathroom stall assuming that it's vacant because you don't see any legs underneath. There might be a child in there, who will scream, and whose mother will burst in and start screaming at you for being a "pedo." FML

#14136515
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25852) - you deserved it (5596)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I planned to drop a water balloon on my visiting prankster brother from my new apartment's balcony. As he crossed the street, I launched the balloon, and sent it right behind him. It hit an eight year old on a scooter. FML

#14126136
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7511) - you deserved it (31196)

On 12/07/2010 at 11:20pm - misc - by bullseyed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34244) - you deserved it (9466)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked into my home office and said F*** you! Then she ran to my husband and said "Did I say it right?" FML

#13484178
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34885) - you deserved it (4656)

On 10/17/2010 at 9:55am - kids - by Ashley Marshburn - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35742) - you deserved it (20898)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)



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