About JessalynVictoria : Just little ol' me. Nothin to see here. Move along... Lol
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JessalynVictoria's favorite FMLs
Today, I saw a woman in the neighbouring apartment taking a shower without pulling the blinds of her bathroom window. As a good Samaritan, I waved my arms to attract her attention that she forgot the blinds. She noticed me, opened the window, did a weird boob dance and middle fingered me. FML
by Magicali / 04/21/2013 at 10:56pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML
by kindergarten teacher / 03/23/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions, and I noticed that one of the boys in the film looked strangely like my dad when he was younger. After a little investigation, I now know that in his youth, my dad had a crippling masturbation problem. FML
by Anonymous / 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy
Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
by Flip / 05/02/2012 at 1:06am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
by Anonymous / 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/16/2012 at 8:38am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML
by Anonymous / 04/14/2012 at 12:24pm / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/14/2012 at 7:10am / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Love
by Beth / 04/13/2012 at 10:12am / Australia (Western Australia) / Love
by Munkeh / 04/12/2012 at 4:42pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Intimacy
Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by girly / 04/12/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/27/2011 at 6:46am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous
by optimistic2628 / 10/19/2011 at 10:03am / United States / Kids
Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
by targe / 10/19/2011 at 5:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to… Today, I found out that if my son and daughter in law are mad at me, they do it on my furniture. So… Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are…
- Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without… Today, I travelled in a shared taxi on the winding roads of the Peruvian Andes. The guy next to me… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of…