About JazzyLOLness : Names Jaz • 17 • Sydney, Australia • depressed • fml
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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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JazzyLOLness's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't get the chance to buy a ticket. When the conductor was in sight, I saw he was a young man and I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I didn't buy a ticket he said: "Close your top, I'm gay". FML
by Mulee / 03/07/2009 at 7:03am / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Intimacy
Today, my mother told me she didn't want my girlfriend spending the night anymore. I asked why, she said she heard us doing the nasty the night before and I denied it, hoping I could call her bluff. She paused for a moment and moaned EXACTLY like my girlfriend does. FML
by ToobyFrank / 03/06/2009 at 12:51pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML
by tryena / 02/28/2009 at 5:59am / United States (Idaho) / Kids
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, on the bus, a young high school boy sat down next to me and started to chat me up. I thought it was cute until he asked me which high school I was attending. I'm 27, I'm married, I have a child. FML
by HappyGirl / 10/28/2008 at 11:57am / France (Centre) / Intimacy
- Today, I've been living in Germany for several weeks now. My classmates still cannot pronounce my… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that…