Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jazoo1

Online | Search for a member

Jazoo1

63Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 October 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1168
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About Jazoo1 : Hi, I'm Jazoo1. I play viola and speak 4 different languages. German, English, Spanish, and American Sign Language. I speak German, English, and American Sign Language fluently. I learned ASL because I have a friend who is deaf and I wanted communicated with him easier. I've played Viola for about 3 years. I like the sound and prefer it to the pitch of a Violin.

I'm a nice person. Why? Because I know what it is like to be hurt. Feeling that makes me want to make sure that no one goes through the experience if I can help it.

Feel free to message me, I enjoy talking to people. If you want to have a conversation we can have one for a year. As long as you're respectful to not only me, but other people, I will respect you.

If you read this far then I applaud you. If you didn't read anything above, then oh well. At least you came to my profile.

Jazoo1's page activity

Visits<b>flux_panic</b> - 13 hours ago<b>Aquamarine9</b> - 13 hours ago<b>anxiousaly</b> - 19 hours ago<b>tartar18</b> - 21 hours ago<b>japcrap</b> - 23 hours ago<b>annihil8or</b> - yesterday at 7:32am<b>Cezll</b> - yesterday at 7:30am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - yesterday at 7:23am<b>jillytc</b> - yesterday at 6:55am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - yesterday at 6:22am<b>nightwings</b> - yesterday at 4:38am<b>DO24SS</b> - yesterday at 1:54am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - yesterday at 1:09am<b>ohjoy15</b> - yesterday at 12:32am<b>patrickalamo</b> - yesterday at 12:10am<b>Jaredphamtom</b> - yesterday at 11:46pm<b>moonlight77</b> - yesterday at 11:39pm<b>nkb94</b> - yesterday at 11:16pm

Liked!<b>Aquamarine9</b> - 10 hours ago<b>japcrap</b> - 17 hours ago<b>jillytc</b> - 22 hours ago<b>icedexplosion</b> - yesterday at 12:22am<b>royr7395</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:36pm<b>awkwardeer</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:46am<b>sydneyy101</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 1:28am<b>anxiousaly</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 1:56am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 7:01am<b>ItsAnanya</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 8:32pm<b>carolyn_m</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 9:53am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 8:02am<b>emmatheamazingx</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:23am<b>dbuckle</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 8:49am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:41am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:04pm<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 4:38pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 7:31am

Jazoo1's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Jazoo1's badges

Jazoo1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML

#16287224
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43353) - you deserved it (5785)

On 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by squirrels69ing (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML

#16068047
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13401) - you deserved it (47445)

On 05/06/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38398) - you deserved it (32067)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I was sleeping in my room when I awoke to an unfamiliar female voice in my apartment followed by a thud. I walked out to find a drunk girl I've never met collapsed in my doorway. After puking all over the place, she had me call her father who picked her up 10 minutes later. FML

#6857935
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25901) - you deserved it (2761)

On 12/21/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by goblue (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, three months after finally ending a long relationship with the love of my life because he was cheating on me, we are now seeing each other again. And cheating on our new significant others with each other. FML

#5735041
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6290) - you deserved it (76996)

On 10/09/2009 at 2:41am - love - by oliviakelly25 (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I stepped on the MacBook Air I purchased 4 days ago. The screen snapped in two, and I didn't buy insurance because I promised myself I would be "extra careful." $3500 well spent. FML

#5121901
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11534) - you deserved it (63903)

On 09/08/2009 at 2:31am - money - by AyDiosMio42 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11253) - you deserved it (50284)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML

#3127990
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47064) - you deserved it (10219)

On 06/22/2009 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

#1942963
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31619) - you deserved it (43924)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I called him around two minutes after that, and he had already fallen asleep. FML

#3910
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7221) - you deserved it (28498)

On 01/30/2009 at 8:57pm - love - by grreeatttt - United States (California)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: