Jaredphamtom

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Offline (the 06/05/2015 at 8:26am)

Jaredphamtom

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 July 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3216
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Jaredphamtom's page activity

Visits<b>am1717</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:42am<b>purplebrittney95</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 2:12pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:05pm<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 2:14am<b>bufay</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 11:41pm<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 11:14pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:25am<b>Angelkisses130</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 5:19pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 3:35pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:52pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 5:35am<b>RAH94</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 4:13am<b>peceout</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 12:19pm<b>fatiezzhm</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:31am<b>kianad97</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:24pm<b>cheeeksss</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:11am<b>cutycat136</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 7:24pm<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 1:23pm

Fucked!<b>Classy_Sassy15</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 1:34pm<b>kayladayla</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:55am<b>fickledrama</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 12:56am

Jaredphamtom's FML badges

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Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

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Jaredphamtom's favorite FMLs

Today, some genius shot through a red light, hitting my car and nearly killing me. When I went to ask if he was okay, the first words out of his mouth were "I hope you have insurance". FML

by hendrixisgod86 / 05/15/2015 at 2:48pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2015 at 12:59pm / India (Delhi) / Intimacy

Today, I had to say to my 23-year-old son that it's not a compliment to tell a woman that he wants to jam his cock down her throat. FML

by dadoftheyear / 05/06/2015 at 11:27pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom got mad at me because I wouldn't write to Ellen Degeneres about her. She now won't talk to me. FML

by anonymous / 05/06/2015 at 9:36am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I changed my toothbrush because the bristles were wearing down. My brother later asked me why I changed his toothbrush. Apparently we've been sharing the same one for the past several weeks. FML

by gross / 05/02/2015 at 2:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

Today, for the first time in my life, a girl showed interest in me. She sent me a text message saying she wanted to come over and fuck my brains out. This would've made me the happiest guy alive, if only she weren't my extremely drunk sister. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2015 at 4:55pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

by S to the HIT / 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2015 at 2:36pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML

by sexybelly / 03/26/2015 at 4:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my best friend confessed to having feelings for me. I've been in love with her for a long time, so I was ecstatic. She doesn't see herself ever going out with me, though, because she's a couple of inches taller and can't imagine herself "towering" over her man. FML

by falling short / 03/20/2015 at 11:26am / India (Maharashtra) / Love

Today, it was my first day working as a pharmacist. I quickly discovered that customers not only think that it makes me qualified to offer free medical advice, but they also have no qualms about showing me their various lumps, bumps, and vaginal leakages. FML

by MyPoorEyes / 03/19/2015 at 9:19am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, after a 16-hour work day, I came home to my husband. I talked to him for about 10 minutes, then realized that he wasn't answering me but had his headset on and was talking on Xbox live. Not even playing a game, just talking. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2015 at 1:35am / Love

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

by pledonasm / 03/15/2015 at 12:11pm / India (Maharashtra) / Kids