About Januzane : Hey you over there! Yes you. Grab a seat while I stare at you and tell stories about turtles and trains.
Januzane's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Januzane's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML
by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
by SassyBasher / 10/17/2013 at 8:14pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 6:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by TiredMum / 10/16/2013 at 9:33am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML
by Eggs6131 / 10/15/2013 at 9:09am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous
by zzfreakshow / 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Animals
by mustabeendrugs / 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit / 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love
Today, after sending in my passport application for a trip to Paris, I got a letter from the state department saying despite them having my original birth certificate, I don't exist. Upon calling them, I was told that it only proves I'm a citizen, not that I exist. I pay taxes and have a mortgage. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2013 at 7:45am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML
by thisguy / 10/08/2013 at 5:55am / United States (California) / Kids
by Ashley / 10/07/2013 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by WhyMe6495 / 10/06/2013 at 6:28pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…