Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

JaneDoexD

Search for a member

JaneDoexD

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3035
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

JaneDoexD's page activity

Visits<b>TheEliteShark69</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 5:08pm

JaneDoexD's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of JaneDoexD's badges

JaneDoexD's favorite FMLs

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

#20144826
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28465) - you deserved it (2932)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by for fuck sake dad (woman) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. I thought it was all going really well, until I looked up a minute or two in, only to be greeted by a stone-cold death glare and the words, "You really are an idiot, aren't you?" FML

#20144510
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31262) - you deserved it (7552)

On 11/02/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my newly ex-fiancé, the father of my 5-year-old child, moved out of state with no warning. I just spent my last $500 paying off his car, and the rent is due tomorrow. FML

#20144316
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22065) - you deserved it (5325)

On 11/02/2012 at 12:35pm - love - by lilithfaye (woman) - United States

Today, after nearly a year of headaches and fuzzy vision, I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had my contacts in the wrong eyes for a year. FML

Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML

#20144153
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22396) - you deserved it (3117)

On 11/02/2012 at 8:17am - work - by PieterseMJ - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I realized why it's a bad idea to store your business cards and your "emergency condom" in the same handbag compartment. I realized this after a client watched me miss the cards and pull out the condom after our lunch meeting. FML

#20144136
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6434) - you deserved it (24224)

On 11/02/2012 at 7:35am - work - by Hornymuch (woman) - Germany

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

#20142294
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33103) - you deserved it (2345)

On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)

Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20136682
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20344) - you deserved it (3186)

On 10/28/2012 at 8:29am - work - by radioinvader (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML

#20136629
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19060) - you deserved it (3809)

On 10/28/2012 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29652) - you deserved it (2401)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

#20136326
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28572) - you deserved it (6305)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Ceej - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was taking a walk with a girl I really like. Trying to impress her, I mentioned I'd just learned how to do a front flip, and she told me to prove it. I did the flip, but stumbled forward on the landing and smacked head-first into a pole. She's still laughing. FML

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

#20135712
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22488) - you deserved it (1652)

On 10/27/2012 at 4:04pm - misc - by left4dead (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9044) - you deserved it (32906)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I decided to watch some porn to cheer myself up after having recently been dumped. Halfway through wanking the gibbon, I got a horrifyingly painful cramp in my foot, and cried out in pain. Ten seconds later, with my pants still down, my dad rushed in to see if I was okay. FML

#20135660
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24339) - you deserved it (13693)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by whoreticulturalist (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: