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JaneChemi

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JaneChemi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 March 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2098
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About JaneChemi : well congratulations you know how to touch a picture

JaneChemi's page activity

Visits<b>Azalea18</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 5:46am<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:20am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:15pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 6:35am<b>citrusfruit</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 7:21am<b>cookycoconut</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:57am<b>Chaoticthor</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 8:57am<b>Joshua333h</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 11:34am<b>niamhyo</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:51am<b>conman531</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 1:33am<b>sagemarie209</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 1:33am<b>ImmortalLove</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 4:33pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 4:40am<b>emilyrrobbins</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 8:05pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 3:56pm<b>fxxmylife</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 2:31pm<b>Goldenchest</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 2:11pm<b>fatimeshala</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 8:14pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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JaneChemi's favorite FMLs

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47598) - you deserved it (3863)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a knock on my door at 3AM. Turns out, if I ignore my mother long enough she will assume I have died and will call the cops. FML

#4889725
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36052) - you deserved it (11962)

On 08/28/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by chasingcars0624 - United States

Today, I thought it was a good idea to go number two while smoking a "cigarette". My ash tray was over by the sink so I decided to just ash in the toilet. While ashing between my legs, I sneezed and now I have a extremely uncomfortable burn on my man member. Smoking is bad. FML

#3821134
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7539) - you deserved it (82058)

On 07/17/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my parents are freaking at me because I just got my report and I failed my first year of college. They told me they have never been more disappointed in me. I have to tell them that I'm also pregnant. FML

#3800582
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21024) - you deserved it (91412)

On 07/16/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by failure - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11158) - you deserved it (50108)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8908) - you deserved it (114717)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML

#2565972
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46213) - you deserved it (15325)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:40pm - kids - by psychortiz (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (417845) - you deserved it (59580)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38419) - you deserved it (129039)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38419) - you deserved it (129039)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

#618069
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33655) - you deserved it (123283)

On 03/26/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by douchetard (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81962) - you deserved it (15001)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML

#446324
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99718) - you deserved it (24746)

On 03/18/2009 at 6:42pm - love - by Syferix (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML

#333311
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38512) - you deserved it (64421)

On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - kids - by superfkd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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