JamesShortland

Search for a member

Offline (the 12/01/2014 at 8:19pm)

JamesShortland

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 755
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

JamesShortland's page activity

Visits<b>Moderator0fFML</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 3:34pm<b>_ibelieve_</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:43pm<b>travjune0610</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:01am<b>12goldfish69</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:34pm<b>VMG</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:31am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:11am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:46pm<b>PickleGoose</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:20am<b>Dodopy</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:07am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 7:37pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 9:54pm<b>Abbey1598</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:10pm<b>chelsealou1997</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 3:24pm<b>Sailer16</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:21pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 3:56am<b>BBlah</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:28am<b>Aquamarine9</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:28am<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 9:47pm

Fucked!<b>Moderator0fFML</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 9:34pm

JamesShortland's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of JamesShortland's badges

JamesShortland's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat tried to jump up to the window, and missed. This would have been hilarious if I had not been sleeping under that same window, and then caught him with my face. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2014 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

by lostintdot / 07/31/2014 at 7:38am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I listened to my best friend describe having sex with her boyfriend in explicit detail. This would have been fine, but her boyfriend is my little brother. FML

by why / 07/27/2014 at 9:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 06/14/2014 at 2:42am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Kids

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2014 at 6:14pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

by embarrassedmom / 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm / United States / Kids

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

by future brain bleach addict / 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I had to pee so bad that I ran downstairs with no glasses on and stumbled into the bathroom, half blind. I sat down on the toilet and realized just a little late that my older sister and her boyfriend were having sex in the bathtub. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2012 at 1:46am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, during my first day as a doctor’s intern, I attended a consultation. The embarrassed patient asked me to leave. Not really knowing my way around, I went through the first door I could find. By the time I realized it was a closet, I didn’t dare come back out. Twenty minutes is a long time to wait. FML

by bibou2324 / 04/18/2012 at 4:41pm / Work

Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML

by ParkerRommel / 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML

by Rash / 12/06/2011 at 11:54am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

by sadsadperson / 09/07/2011 at 4:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy