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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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JamesM9794

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JamesM9794
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1620
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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JamesM9794's favorite FMLs

Today, I did my laundry. When I took it out, everything was clean, including the mouse that had been hiding in it. FML

#9157447 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (19994) - you deserved it (3204)

On 03/17/2010 at 11:22am - misc - by socksoffire (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML

#6210144 (293)

I agree, your life sucks (58524) - you deserved it (4093)

On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States

Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML

#5541044 (264)

I agree, your life sucks (51572) - you deserved it (1632)

On 09/29/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by rainedaddy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (56997) - you deserved it (1910)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got shoved into a wall and pickpocketed. I was already in a bad mood from being dumped, so I chased the guy, tackled him so hard he was knocked out. As I retrieved my things, the police arrested me and apparently the robber was the cop's son, and didn't believe my statement. FML

#5038784 (147)

I agree, your life sucks (48435) - you deserved it (1692)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:14am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was walking through my house when I saw a strange man sitting on my couch. I asked him who he was and he said he was a friend of my mom's. He told me to join him and when I sat down, he punched me in the face and stole my cell phone, wallet, and car keys. FML

#5021178 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (47478) - you deserved it (15581)

On 09/03/2009 at 3:09pm - misc - by robbed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML

#4829994 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (54501) - you deserved it (3223)

On 08/26/2009 at 3:09am - love - by micahmatt (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had my sweet sixteen party. All my best friends came to the microphone to make a little speech. When my boyfriend came to do his, he broke up with me. FML

#4687327 (207)

I agree, your life sucks (49221) - you deserved it (3818)

On 08/20/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by 16isntsweet (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML

#4644829 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (52711) - you deserved it (1911)

On 08/19/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Amara1717 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my ex showed up at my door with chocolates and flowers. I've liked him since I was 13, starting dating him when I was 15. He proposed when I was 22. I am now 24, and yesterday was our wedding day. He didn't show. FML

#4644175 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (54950) - you deserved it (2431)

On 08/18/2009 at 11:59pm - love - by Wowfmylife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!!" FML

#4630669 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (74619) - you deserved it (4457)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (46832) - you deserved it (3403)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

#4479707 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (48387) - you deserved it (1949)

On 08/12/2009 at 5:01pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, at work, a man bought a lot of really expensive stuff. He paid the large bill with cash, and the manager helped me count the money. When we were done, he handed me a $100 bill to thank me for all the help. We can't accept tips. The manager was next to me. I had to say no. FML

#4451238 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (52693) - you deserved it (2248)

On 08/11/2009 at 1:57pm - work - by aw-wtf (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I told my friend how I liked this girl but was too scared to ask her out. He told me "Why? The worst she's going to do is say no." Building confidence I approached her and asked her on a date. Then she replied "Get away douchebag!" and kicked me in the nuts. FML

#4423387 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (46235) - you deserved it (3150)

On 08/10/2009 at 5:20am - love - by Rejected (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)