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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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JamesAlexRose

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JamesAlexRose
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1985 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 235
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911 (295)

I agree, your life sucks (60052) - you deserved it (2766)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of 'Fight Club'. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (18603) - you deserved it (8590)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after months of constant encouragement from my friends, I went and entered a singing contest. I sang and was booed off stage. Later on I found out my friends lied to me about my ability to sing, just so I could give them a cheap laugh. FML

#6759322 (40)

I agree, your life sucks (17910) - you deserved it (4106)

On 12/15/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Dean (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at my 10 year high school reunion. I saw the girl I used to have a BIG crush on, so I decided to go over and say hi. She screams when she sees me. Then, she starts hitting me, looking panicked. I control her and ask why she's hitting me. She says 'Everyone thought you were dead!' FML

#6753136 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (26702) - you deserved it (1431)

On 12/14/2009 at 4:21pm - misc - by Ghost (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I was "letting myself go". When I told the little girl I babysit in the afternoons why I was so upset, she looked at me for a moment before saying, "Well, I definitely can't blame him." FML

#6716772 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (18043) - you deserved it (5296)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I fainted and woke up in a hospital. My mom drove me to the emergency room. The doctor said I had a panic attack. What did I have a panic attack from? Bidding on ebay. FML

#6713073 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (6769) - you deserved it (17926)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by graospe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

#6439149 (409)

I agree, your life sucks (57270) - you deserved it (8514)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by buhknee - United States (North Carolina)

Today, some girl punched me in the face and left a huge purple bruise. Apparently her boyfriend has been cheating on her with me because she always sees him walking me home. Her boyfriend is my older brother who didn't bother telling her who I was because "he wanted to see what she would do." FML

#6438315 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (31895) - you deserved it (1450)

On 11/24/2009 at 5:47pm - misc - by DayamyWuzHere (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that the drunk-me deletes my texts, so the sober-me doesn't get mad. Well turns out, whatever the drunk-me said, caused me to lose my job, my girlfriend, and my coffee machine. FML

#6100010 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (8682) - you deserved it (32417)

On 11/01/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML

#5971275 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (21815) - you deserved it (4179)

On 10/24/2009 at 6:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, as I was driving with my boyfriend, he pointed out what a crappy car I drive. About how the locks don't work, the vents are broken, the windshield wipers are busted, my headlights aren't bright, and a hubcap is missing. Then he said I’m a good match for my car, 'cos we have the same “personality". FML

#5969153 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (21335) - you deserved it (2296)

On 10/24/2009 at 1:07am - love - by Clunker (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landed on my head from out of no where. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look we hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML

#5943404 (91)

I agree, your life sucks (25813) - you deserved it (3638)

On 10/22/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by mvgirl - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

#5690935 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (27215) - you deserved it (4443)

On 10/06/2009 at 9:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML

#5407615 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (29428) - you deserved it (11008)

On 09/22/2009 at 12:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (19313) - you deserved it (3441)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)