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JakeQuake

Offline (the 10/03/2014 at 4:53am) | Search for a member

JakeQuake

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 838
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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JakeQuake's page activity

Visits<b>Ravenz</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 2:40pm

JakeQuake's FML badges

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JakeQuake's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that even though a woman has a baby carriage and seems friendly, she won't be afraid to mug you in front of her kid. FML

#21262985
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34792) - you deserved it (2866)

On 09/22/2014 at 6:58am - health - by deathstar3548 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got hit by a car while riding my bike to work. In the hospital, every single nurse lectured me about how I wouldn't be here if I wore a helmet, which I'm sure would be really helpful to my broken leg. FML

#21262936
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37492) - you deserved it (4555)

On 09/22/2014 at 2:45am - health - by thebrokentardis (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was reviewing for a major nursing school exam I have this week. I panicked because none of the material seemed familiar, and figured that I must've missed something during class and now had to catch up. After 4 hours, I finally realized that I'd been studying from the wrong textbook. FML

#21262757
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29602) - you deserved it (12437)

On 09/21/2014 at 10:12pm - misc - by IdiotNursingStudent (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a garage sale, and had amongst my clothing a few sets of underwear. A old man came up and asked to buy all of them. I'm so poor, I couldn't say no to the pervert. FML

#21262480
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34228) - you deserved it (6956)

On 09/21/2014 at 2:23pm - money - by sickened (woman) - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked and walked in, expecting to catch him red handed with a girl. He'd just beaten his high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21262395
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (335) - you deserved it (7844)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:33am - intimacy - by royallymessedup - United Kingdom

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35916) - you deserved it (3365)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34583) - you deserved it (4390)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got an Economics test back from my professor. I got a 17/20. I looked it over and noticed one of the questions was completely right. I checked the textbook he made and the answer was the same. I asked him why it was wrong, and he responded with, "I guess I changed my mind." FML

#21260926
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36516) - you deserved it (2188)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:44pm - misc - by badprofessor - United States (New York)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, I wrecked my car because my mom texted me, telling me not to text and drive. FML

#21249597
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22763) - you deserved it (40017)

On 09/01/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML

#21249322
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36328) - you deserved it (2694)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45677) - you deserved it (7605)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64539) - you deserved it (4110)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43534) - you deserved it (16542)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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