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Jailee's FML badges
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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Jailee's favorite FMLs
by PrettyScared / 07/29/2013 at 11:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML
by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by confusedmofo / 07/29/2013 at 2:35am / Indonesia / Love
Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML
by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML
by suckstosuck / 07/23/2013 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I confessed to losing my wife's engagement ring, and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessed that her actual engagement ring was locked in the safe, and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML
by RonnieG / 07/22/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by ihatepokemon / 07/22/2013 at 6:14pm / United States / Love
by facepalm / 07/22/2013 at 4:19pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was reassuring my girlfriend that I wasn't cheating on her because I was sneaking around. I'm actually just planning a surprise birthday party for her. During the reassuring, I accidentally called her another girl's name. FML
by Anonymous / 07/22/2013 at 4:47am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love
Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML
by Anonymous / 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML
by helpme / 07/15/2013 at 1:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by leeceetaylor99 / 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I told my girlfriend about my extreme fear of flying roaches. She immediately got upset because she thought, since I'm from the Caribbean, I would be "manlier" and "eat stuff like that for breakfast". FML
by sammy77sam / 07/15/2013 at 9:41am / Saint Kitts and Nevis (Saint George Basseterre) / Transportation
by lilly1105 / 07/15/2013 at 9:19am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 10:24am / United States / Intimacy