About JackeeDawn : 'Murica :)
Waiting for a man in a blue phone booth to fall from the sky and take me away.
About JackeeDawn : 'Murica :)
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JackeeDawn's favorite FMLs
by sickness_sucks / 06/15/2012 at 2:19am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML
by aranya / 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm / Netherlands (Overijssel) / Intimacy
Today, my husband called me in the middle of the morning. He was in jail and wanted me to bail him out. Not only was he stupid enough to go drunk drag-racing with his buddies, their route took them straight past the front of the local police precinct. FML
by Anonymous / 05/23/2012 at 5:14pm / United States / Money
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
by Anonymous / 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by T3STI / 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by madseason / 05/06/2012 at 8:13pm / United States / Intimacy
by CALIdime_15 / 05/05/2012 at 1:42am / United States / Intimacy
by dentistrygirl / 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, my new neighbours moved in. I've neither seen nor spoken to them yet; all I know is that they enjoy hammering at the walls for hours on end and repeatedly setting off the fire alarm. All this in the small hours of the morning. I got two hours of sleep. FML
by Anonymous / 05/01/2012 at 3:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by lowlife123 / 04/30/2012 at 11:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
Today, I went to dinner to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I received a text message, so I pulled out my phone to check. Apparently, his parents have a "No phone at the table rule" and took my phone away until I can learn "proper table manners." FML
by grounded / 12/18/2011 at 4:59am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML
by Mandy / 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after he gave me the 'let's just be friends' speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML
by Anonanon / 07/12/2011 at 1:10pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy
Today, I went to the hospital to visit my aunt and her newborn baby. The receptionist gave me the room number, and I went and my aunt was in the bathroom so I cuddle the baby, only to find that the woman who came out of the bathroom was a complete stranger. I was holding her baby. FML
by Anonymous / 01/23/2011 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML
by Nicole / 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…