Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jaager

Online | Search for a member

Jaager

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 June 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6922
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Jaager's page activity

Visits<b>xenilou</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:37am<b>Donuts202</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:22pm<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:56pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 4:14pm<b>brittaaany_93</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 11:27am<b>aishah77</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 7:03am<b>ToxicLover29</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:19pm<b>IvyRizzzzoli</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 5:37pm<b>cadillacgal79</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 6:38am<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 8:45am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 1:45pm<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 1:29pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:20am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 6:36am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:44pm<b>PatrickSwayzebae</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:45pm<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 5:44pm

Fucked!<b>Donuts202</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 4:22am<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:29pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:00am<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:04pm<b>summer135790</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:35pm

Jaager's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Jaager's badges

Jaager's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to have a cervical biopsy. The doctor said I would feel slight cramping as she scraped cells from inside the cervix. I guess by "slight cramping" she meant I would shit, throw up, and then pass out. FML

#21395495
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9524) - you deserved it (567)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:15pm - health - by khaoslife - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my fiancé freaked when he noticed the tattoo on my wrist, and demanded to know when I got it. It was two years before we even started dating. FML

#21395494
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8764) - you deserved it (637)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:12pm - love - by pandapantsMD (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I coughed so hard that I fractured two ribs. FML

#21395325
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14816) - you deserved it (1123)

On 04/17/2015 at 5:47pm - health - by rachlette (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML

#21395300
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14447) - you deserved it (1679)

On 04/17/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my husband accidentally erased some pictures from our hard drive. No worries, nothing major: just everything from our wedding and the birth of our first child. FML

#21395232
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21781) - you deserved it (2299)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:15pm - misc - by testom - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my roommate and I are so broke, we resorted to going to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting just for the refreshments. FML

#21395180
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18847) - you deserved it (2459)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:50am - money - by jamongrande - United States (California)

Today, while mowing my backyard, I carelessly ran over a fire ant hill. Thousands of tiny stinging insects blowing towards you while you're wearing shorts and a t-shirt is definitely not fun. FML

#21395171
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (3085)

On 04/17/2015 at 11:27am - health - by Mitchellbassists (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got banned from my favourite online video game for calling a person on my team a "Baked Potato". FML

Today, I was trying to make a good impression with my fiancé's friends. After a few hours, I thought all was going well. As I walked to the washroom, I heard, "So what disability does she have? No one can be like that without something wrong in their brain." FML

#21395050
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21218) - you deserved it (1777)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:24am - love - by apparently_disabled - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to get a colonoscopy. Which wouldn't have been so bad if they had removed the camera from my rectum before waking me up. FML

#21395025
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21869) - you deserved it (1458)

On 04/17/2015 at 12:56am - health - by Camera - United States (California)

Today, I received a terrible grade for an essay I worked really hard on. I had two friends, one being an English major, check it over. However, apparently I "clearly didn't use spellcheck" on this essay just like the last one I submitted to her. FML

#21394988
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18551) - you deserved it (4031)

On 04/16/2015 at 11:34pm - work - by shaifox96 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after a discussion, my boyfriend said, "I think it's time you found somebody better." After I gave him a look, he continued, "For me." FML

#21394512
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22927) - you deserved it (1994)

On 04/16/2015 at 3:59am - love - by Marona (woman) - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25764) - you deserved it (4106)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, while cleaning my desk I found a stray gumball. I quickly popped it into my mouth only to discover with horror that it was a paintball. FML

#21394264
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13585) - you deserved it (27317)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: