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Jaaared_

Offline (the 11/03/2014 at 8:43pm) | Search for a member

Jaaared_

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1032
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Jaaared_ : I play guitar. I'm getting my pilot's license.

Jaaared_'s page activity

Visits<b>umerin</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 10:11pm<b>odod777</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 3:50pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 2:28am<b>pisseatdick</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 10:01pm<b>sammy1021</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 11:01pm<b>creeperwindow</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 11:31pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 1:54pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 1:35pm<b>LolliDolly</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 8:57am<b>SoMei</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:01pm<b>calipilot227</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 1:56pm<b>Nooblah</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:31pm<b>snippit</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:11am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 9:53pm<b>Rhett_15</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:20pm<b>burninsnow</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 6:09am<b>the_Jessicaaa</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:33am<b>lions_maine</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 11:07am

Liked!<b>umerin</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 8:29am

Jaaared_'s FML badges

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Jaaared_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36505) - you deserved it (16185)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at the beach, I noticed a plastic bag in the water. I wanted to do something good for a change, help protect the environment and get it out. It wasn't a bag; it was a jellyfish. FML

#21236316
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39256) - you deserved it (8399) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2014 at 12:28am - animals - by Muwz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38712) - you deserved it (12845)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML

#21204205
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43728) - you deserved it (3082)

On 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by ninnang - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46560) - you deserved it (6999)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML

#21137290
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48475) - you deserved it (4420)

On 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by Gone With the Wind - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

#21134831
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46941) - you deserved it (4311)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:24pm - love - by WTTFFFF (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37791) - you deserved it (20062)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38756) - you deserved it (4262)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes shit." Not only will he not stop saying it, I have no idea who taught him to say it in the first place. FML

#21116585
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39410) - you deserved it (4371)

On 04/18/2014 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex and in the heat of the moment I cried out for him to go harder. He had an exasperated expression on his face, and in an adamantly offended tone he said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he stopped and left the room. FML

#21115855
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58227) - you deserved it (8267)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by belljars (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52059) - you deserved it (4707)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, my co-worker started talking in third person. Not only that, but he narrates his daily tasks. "Jeff reached for a stapler", "Jeff stapled a report". I have to sit beside this chimp for 8 hours a day, and nothing I say can end this. FML

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

#21107421
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42820) - you deserved it (6251)

On 04/08/2014 at 3:56am - misc - by the long distance guy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I discovered that the laser disc player I used to have was not in fact a laser disc player but a Pioneer Laseractive. Broken ones sell on eBay for $200 and working ones sell for around $1000. I sold a working one for less than $100-worth of credit at a second-hand store. FML

#21102658
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34227) - you deserved it (16439)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:20am - misc - by Sad Nerd (man) - United States (Arizona)



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