Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

JJ_Rokk

Search for a member

JJ_Rokk
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 469
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About JJ_Rokk : Musician

JJ_Rokk's last visitors

fuckyourlifeOPguitardude69shaarizzie321MadisonErinBToxicSilencejaybear13psyduck1219

JJ_Rokk's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of JJ_Rokk's badges

JJ_Rokk's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML

#20952213
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35481) - you deserved it (16317)

On 11/10/2013 at 12:51am - misc - by tramp - United States

Today, my coworkers glued pairs of different sized googly eyes all over my office equipment, seconds before an important client arrived. FML

#20788188
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41570) - you deserved it (3295)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:55am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at his parents' house. I was overjoyed. His mom hugged me with tears in her eyes. His father, who never really spoke before, hugged me a few hours later when we were alone, his hands traveling to my ass and whispering, "I can change your mind." FML

#20788139
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64376) - you deserved it (3697)

On 07/17/2013 at 10:20am - misc - by ilivehere (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML

#20787181
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37453) - you deserved it (7786)

On 07/16/2013 at 9:55pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my husband, only to find that his ex-wife worked there. Then I found out he never actually divorced her. FML

#20786957
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52207) - you deserved it (3352)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by me:( - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was proposed to, under the condition that I "get thin" first. FML

#20578323
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44799) - you deserved it (8810)

On 04/06/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by ziggers10 - United States

Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML

#20577218
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36469) - you deserved it (17978)

On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML

#20570614
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38493) - you deserved it (5639)

On 04/01/2013 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by LadySteveMartin (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30502) - you deserved it (3470)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML

#20537344
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22387) - you deserved it (3707)

On 03/09/2013 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I was walking through my town when a man on a bicycle rolled up to me and said, "I don't mean this offensively but you're really well-built." I don't know whether he was commenting on my height or comparing me to a shed, but my mother won't stop laughing. FML

#20531997
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21990) - you deserved it (2638)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by apparently-a-shed (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was walking to my professor's office. I've had an upset stomach all week, and I still felt a little gassy, so I politely decided to pass gass before entering the room. More than just gas came out. FML

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24606) - you deserved it (3377)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40518) - you deserved it (5136)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML

#20521938
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26886) - you deserved it (5212)

On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: