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JFloUnknown

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JFloUnknown
  • Town/Country : San Antonio, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 November 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2360
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About JFloUnknown : I'm not very interesting. try me. meow.

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JFloUnknown's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date for the first time in eight months. He didn't make a move. I then asked if we were on a date. He said, "I don't know, I guess." I can't tell either. FML

#15705235
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22525) - you deserved it (3971)

On 04/09/2011 at 4:08am - love - by confused (woman) - United States (California)

Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML

#15705121
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16735) - you deserved it (28276)

On 04/09/2011 at 3:52am - misc - by 2classicNot2 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was looking in my grandparents' drawers and cupboards to find a blanket, but instead found a stash of sex toys, and a male G-string with a horse on the front. The best bit? When you press the horse's nose, it neighs. FML

#15703960
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32761) - you deserved it (7303)

On 04/09/2011 at 1:46am - intimacy - by fuundmental/// - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my cat is allergic to ME. No kidding. FML

#15703815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28942) - you deserved it (3617)

On 04/09/2011 at 1:32am - animals - by blehhx - United States

Today, I found out that my now-ex slept with his not-so-ex the day before our wedding. FML

#15702411
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39676) - you deserved it (2985)

On 04/09/2011 at 12:02am - love - by WhatTheBleep (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

#15702397
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20551) - you deserved it (11113)

On 04/09/2011 at 12:01am - health - by FistFighter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally confessed my feelings to my long time crush. He was the only one I've been able to muster up the courage to open up to. He replied "lmao" and hasn't texted back since. FML

#15700119
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31622) - you deserved it (5920)

On 04/08/2011 at 9:39pm - love - by notfunny - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML

#15698653
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16947) - you deserved it (31924)

On 04/08/2011 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
590 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48031) - you deserved it (5151)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28703) - you deserved it (10134)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a guy who annoys me walked over. To avoid speaking to him, I pretended to be on the phone and he walked away. A few moments later, my phone rang. I looked around to see if he'd seen me. He had. He was the one ringing me from down the hall. FML

#15678206
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8363) - you deserved it (32053)

On 04/07/2011 at 9:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I finally learned why the application of lasers, acids, liquid nitrogen and witchcraft never did any good on the huge warts on my hands. Apparently, it's a genetic disease and not a virus. For unknown reasons, I've recently grown the normal viral kind too. On my tongue. FML

Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML

#15676274
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41055) - you deserved it (3501)

On 04/07/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, my wife figured that a good foreplay move would be to rub MY underwear in MY face. FML

#15675353
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31486) - you deserved it (8834)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:19am - intimacy - by 1337fade (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I sprained my sternum in my rugby match. I now can't yell, laugh, cough, inhale or exhale fully, or sneeze without a sharp pain shooting through my chest. I have a pollen allergy, and sneeze every 5 or 10 minutes. FML

#15674369
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (3560)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:17am - health - by ouchiee (woman) - United States (California)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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