About JFloUnknown : I'm not very interesting. try me. meow.
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JFloUnknown's favorite FMLs
Today, I went outside to smoke a cigarette. I had my headphones in and was blasting my music. It was also cold so I had my hood up. I had my back turned to the house and wasn't paying attention. My brother thought I was a burglar and tackled me to the concrete. FML
by Ouch / 04/10/2011 at 4:55am / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Monique / 04/10/2011 at 2:50am / United States (Texas) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 2:05am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 1:07am / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by torny>horny / 04/10/2011 at 12:42am / United States / Love
by Sid / 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was reading a blog post by a girl that I really like. In the post, it said, "I know I'm not beautiful." I told her that I thought it wasn't true at all. She responded by crying hysterically and asking me why I would say that. It turned out that it actually said, "I know I'm beautiful." FML
by Arran / 04/09/2011 at 8:24pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love
Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML
by Danielle / 04/09/2011 at 7:00pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
by Z / 04/09/2011 at 6:29pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Miscellaneous
by Jill / 04/09/2011 at 6:00pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/09/2011 at 2:37pm / United States / Kids
Today, I filed my taxes. As a divorcée with children, I was supposed to get $3,500 back from the IRS. Alas, my ex's new wife already filed with my children, who don't live with her. I now owe the IRS $250. FML
by fuckmylifeLulu / 04/09/2011 at 12:07pm / United States (Texas) / Money
Today, when I picked up my repeat subscription of anti-anxiety medication, they had changed the packaging to be more 'child safe'. Now it's so hard to get the pills out that I had an anxiety attack trying to take one. FML
by VoiceMail / 04/09/2011 at 8:53am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
by Tweety / 04/09/2011 at 7:40am / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my grandma got up at 6:30am, clattered about the bathroom then sang religious songs at the top of her voice for half an hour. Apparently this is her normal routine, weekends included. She is staying with us for a month. FML
by Riley / 04/09/2011 at 4:21am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 2Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…