About JFloUnknown : I'm not very interesting. try me. meow.
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JFloUnknown's favorite FMLs
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous
by random / 05/13/2013 at 11:06am / United States / Animals
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
by walmart: first time, last time / 05/12/2013 at 12:37pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Baikal / 05/12/2013 at 12:09am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by GaveAnInchTakeAMile / 05/11/2013 at 5:52am / United States / Miscellaneous
by tdrtnlz / 05/11/2013 at 2:25am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love
Today, I was making tea when I smelled something burning. My very fluffy cat had put his tail right next to the open flame and burnt his fur. Now I have a semi-hairless cat and a very smelly apartment. FML
by AussieG75 / 05/07/2013 at 10:18am / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
by Sirah90 / 05/07/2013 at 3:29am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous
by annoyedgirl / 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (Washington) / Work
Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML
by SSeizeTheDay / 05/03/2013 at 4:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by future brain bleach addict / 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML
by itsellie27 / 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by fiercehawk / 04/24/2013 at 2:23am / United States (Indiana) / Health
- Today, my boyfriend dumped me, yet again, because his mother made him. Fortunately for me I found… Today, I'm sick. This wouldn't be such a problem if I wasn't leaving for college in three days, and… Today, I decided to sink low enough to sign up for one of those 'get paid for taking a survey site'…